itsmeagain Posted July 25, 2013 Share Posted July 25, 2013 English tourists. One of them, Cedric Spratt, of Aylesbury,........ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted July 25, 2013 Share Posted July 25, 2013 suffered more than most, as he was afflicted with a delicate constitution and spent most of his holiday frequenting the unisex ..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted July 25, 2013 Share Posted July 25, 2013 toilets, where much fun was had as Cedric thought "that`s the queue for me" when he heard the name Leslie mentioned...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kushy Posted July 25, 2013 Share Posted July 25, 2013 In one or the another place discipline should be there know!.......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted July 26, 2013 Share Posted July 26, 2013 Cedric practised discipline by crossing his legs and hopping on the spot, but to little avail, and being unable to hold on a minute longer, he took the unprecedented step (for him) of ......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted July 27, 2013 Share Posted July 27, 2013 entering the women`s toilet, by accident, and shuffling quietly into a cubicle he..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted July 27, 2013 Share Posted July 27, 2013 backed rapidly back out again, followed by a high-pitched scream. Blushing furiously, he was startled to be grabbed roughly by a burly gendarme who frog-marched him straight towards ..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted July 27, 2013 Share Posted July 27, 2013 the police van, he was pushed in the back and had the door shut upon him.Cedric was Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dex Posted July 27, 2013 Share Posted July 27, 2013 Only too aware that the french Gendarmerie were quite strict on their application of the law, He decided on the spot that he would contact the British Consul at the earliest opportunity... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted July 27, 2013 Share Posted July 27, 2013 Hello, yes it`s Cedric here, Cedric Spratt of Aylesbury, Buckingham county, if you will, he spluttered into the cell phone..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted July 29, 2013 Share Posted July 29, 2013 The cell phone went dead. 'Oh dash it all!' cried Cedric, now not only at maximum bladder capacity but also at the end of his tether. Fortunately he had studied the rudiments of French before his trip and now demanded 'Les toilettes rapidimente!' However, his accent wasn't the best and the French being the French ............. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted July 31, 2013 Share Posted July 31, 2013 asked petit Cedrique to parlez francais s`il vous plait, as it were...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted August 2, 2013 Share Posted August 2, 2013 'I'm jolly well parlezing Francais, my man, and if you don't lead me to votre commodes VITE, you'll be mopping up un grande PUDDLE!!' Miraculously, the gendarmes had no difficulty understanding this and immediately ........... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted August 2, 2013 Share Posted August 2, 2013 Opened le door to le toilet without further ado.locking the door petit cedrique relieved the strain and devised a plan...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted August 5, 2013 Share Posted August 5, 2013 A plan so cunning, you could pin a tail on it and call it a weasel (Cedric was a big fan of Blackadder). All he needed was a ..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted August 6, 2013 Share Posted August 6, 2013 way to open le fenetre at le back of le toilet and he .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dex Posted August 6, 2013 Share Posted August 6, 2013 jumped out of the fenetre and was up le allez tout suite... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted August 7, 2013 Share Posted August 7, 2013 and was onto the next boat home before you could say 'les carottes sont cuites'. Now who do you think he should bump into but Dex and Bessie, also returning home, and rather wider in the girth and lighter in the pocket after several weeks of ........... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dex Posted August 7, 2013 Share Posted August 7, 2013 Relaxation, Bessie had put on a bit of weight, But Dex was sure she'd lose when she was back behind the bar... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted August 7, 2013 Share Posted August 7, 2013 This made Bessie rather huffy. She flounced off, calling over her shoulder, 'REAL men LIKE curves, so THERE!' Oh, oh, dex was in trouble now, he ...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dex Posted August 7, 2013 Share Posted August 7, 2013 mumbled under his breath, Women, I knew she'd lose It behind the bar. He settled down with his pint in a straight glass and pondered the eternal question of... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted August 8, 2013 Share Posted August 8, 2013 where do all the odd socks disappear to after the washing machine stops.....? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted August 8, 2013 Share Posted August 8, 2013 and why you never find a lost article until you replace it. Dex came very close to solving these deep philosophical problems, only to .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dex Posted August 8, 2013 Share Posted August 8, 2013 realise that the deepest problem presented itself in the form of his empty cider glass... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted August 9, 2013 Share Posted August 9, 2013 which he decided to replenish but when hand entered pocket, wallet was missing..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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