Continue the story.....

[itsmeagain]

the lights came on.  Nothing striking, average Hilton room, no gold plated cups, no gifts for spending large amounts on frippery and crap. Nevertheless,  I decided to have a bit of exploration . The bathroom, red, elegant, suave, was exactly 💯 👌 of what I love, you see I

[lunababymoonchild]

found myself in somebody else's bathroom. The lights went on so suddenly I had forgotten that I was in the lift on the way down and the temporary brightness of the lights after the pitch black dazzled me into thinking that I was in my own room. Hastily I made my way back to the lift and went up to my room. As I went in all the lights were on and I was delighted to find that I too had a red, elegant, suave bathroom which was also exactly what I love. I was even more delighted to find the very lovely Pythagoras in the bath, all fragrant oils and champagne. Just as I was about to jump in ………..

[poppy]

I could feel myself falling and with a crash and a scream, landed in a heap on the floor. The members of the philatelic group peered down at me in concern.

'Are you all right, dear? Whatever happened?' asked Myrtle Mint.

'My alternative reality ended, I was on the 13th floor', I groaned. They tut-tutted and tapped their heads.

Myrtle went off to make me a large mug of hot sweet tea and I started ...

[itsmeagain]

to meditate on the wondrous stamp books I had read over the years.

Mrs Melfuddle's letter to Ethiopia, by Barwin Burke,

Stamps of the world by Brian Smith,

Have fun with stamps by Sheldon Cooper, 

Knapsack, rucksack, haversack, stamps by Elise Surpreeze..

The list simply went on and on, like a sermon from your wife about tea stains on...

Edited August 29, 2023 by itsmeagain

[poppy]

my white jockey Y-fronts.

'How the hell did you get it down there?? And I bloody well hope it was scalding hot! You better get to and give them a jolly good scrub! If you think I'm going to spend my time bent over a tub, rubbing my hands raw, and working my fingers to the bone, you've got another thing coming. And while I'm on the subject ...'  and on and on and on ad infinitum.

I tried to focus and remember what I was doing here. Part of me ...

 

Edited August 31, 2023 by poppy

[itsmeagain]

felt quite thrilled. After all, I have always enjoyed a firm, superior woman, and my wife was definitely that. 👌 

'Oh well, you see, I was simply methodically folding  my undercrackers  routinely, last Thursday,  when came a knock on the door. Since I was folding the garments with one hand, in the other a flask of hot sweet tea, I spilled....

Edited August 29, 2023 by itsmeagain

[lunababymoonchild]

it all over the place. Clearly some of it got on my Jockeys. Ah well, there you are my sweet. Don't stress yourself I'll have them cleaned and everything will be fine. Any chance of a cup of hot sweet tea, my love?" I gently enquired as I went back to my meditating. Just then ....................... 

[itsmeagain]

I qut daydreaming, 

only for kind old Mrs Mint to be waving smelling salts under my nose, trying to pour brandy into my mouth, and generally....

Edited August 29, 2023 by itsmeagain

[poppy]

causing unintentional asphyxiation. If it hadn't been for Willie Wishbone sitting me up and administering a mighty thump between the shoulders, I would have succumbed. What with one thing and another, I was starting to feel ...

[itsmeagain]

as if I longed for the comfort of room 456 again . Johnny Bravo has just got to be brave, it is totally essential,  I mused, and off I went, entering my room and falling into a deep sleep on my comfortable,  sleep easy,  bed. I woke 2 hrs later, sleepy and wondering what had happened to Millie. Looking her up on Google,   I ☎️ telephoned her, receiving the.....

[lunababymoonchild]

shock of my life. How could this be happening? Are things really this bad? Crikey! Better move fast, so the first thing that I did  ...................................

[poppy]

was make a large mug of hot sweet tea. Then packing my rucksack with essentials which included a tea strainer, knucklebones, a hand drill, a stick of limp celery and ...

[itsmeagain]

3 cartons of soya milk, and an orange, I accepted word, via phone, from Millie, that I will only get paid  if I make contact with Charlene's chapeaux and damn....

Edited August 31, 2023 by itsmeagain

[lunababymoonchild]

me all to h3ll and back again if I am not completely fed up to the back teeth with the whole lot of them! Even the sensuous and lovely Pythagoras can do one! I am off to see my Auntie Biscuit in Cumbernauld (town outside Glasgow, Scotland) and I'm not coming back!
 

Having finished packing and slung my back pack on my back I was just about to leave when ……..

Edited August 31, 2023 by lunababymoonchild

[poppy]

my phone rang and the old trouble and strife got stuck into me again. I hung up, turned the damned thing off, hopped on a bus and headed for the hills. I'd just closed my eyes and started to relax when ...

[lunababymoonchild]

"Hello, my name is ........" and that's as far as I got. She unleashed some scary sounding verbiage in her native Polish and scared the livin' daylights out of me. I slunk back to my seat in shame, with the rest of the bus passengers greatly amused, and, fortunately for me, someone sitting at the front of the bus got up and gave her a seat, which was very far away from me. Since the bus was now full and the heating was on as high as it would go - or so it seemed to me, red-faced? me? - with the gentle rocking motion I soon felt my head swaying. The next thing I know  ................

Edited September 1, 2023 by lunababymoonchild

[itsmeagain]

we were in a seedy bar in downtown Auchtermuchty.  In strode Dubaius  Moroseness, 45, a denizen of York, claiming precedence without prejudice,  regarding...

[lunababymoonchild]

English Superiority. Having had a belly-full in Canada and then being humiliated on the bus home, I was not about to tolerate any chicanery from some toffy-nosed and sombre English person and certainly not in my home country. Dubaius Moroseness may well have a very fitting name for his job and been high up in the High Priesthood of Bipolarish Tendancies but that did not and would not ever get him anywhere here in Scotland. But before I could get anywhere near him (for it's a known fact that in a seedy and downtown bar in Auchtermuchty that type of condescending attitude would have to die) he was chibbed by a certain wee nyaff who, it turned out, had been lying in wait just for that very purpose. It was all very disturbing because that gave me pause to realise that I knew full well that Auchtermuchty did not have a downtown - nowhere in Scotland does and if you say that to a Scottish person the best you can expect to get is a puzzled look - much less a seedy bar, never mind a chibbing. Auchtermuchy, it was all coming back to me as I woke myself up, was a respectable community populated by decent people. And what was a representatve of the not popular and very contentious High Priesthood of Bipolarish Tendancies doing in a morally upright and law-abiding village like Auchtermuchty? 

 

Clearly I was not in Auchtermuchty. Although definitely somewhere in Scotland. I knew that because it was raining and the scenery, such as it was, was verdant. Where was I then? I wanted to visit my Aunt Biscuit. Where could she be? Confusion reigned until I met  .......................................

Edited September 1, 2023 by lunababymoonchild

[poppy]

,very fortuitously as it happened, my cousin Ginger Biscuit. After he'd gone through all the 'Lang time nae see's, 'Hoo's it gaun' and 'Yer lookin’ a bit peely wally!', I managed to get a word in edgeways and ask ...

[lunababymoonchild]

him where we actually were, because I didn't recognise the place. "Weel, it's haurdly suprisin' that ye dinna ken whaur ye aur. Yer in Nether Bogside which is in the Ecclefechan parish, it is'nae weel kent. Ah mooooved here ages ago when mah mither wis drivin' me up the wa'. She canna fin me here, so dinna tell her." he said. Once I got to the end of all that (and it took some doing, I hadn't practiced my Scottish lingual skills in quite clearly a very long time) I explained that it was not his mother I had come to see but my other Aunt Biscuit and that I'd be obliged if he could show me how to get there. "Ach dinna fash yersel'. Ah'll be mor' n' happy to gie ye a lift, ye ken. But first ............."

Edited September 2, 2023 by lunababymoonchild

[poppy]

we'll have a wee strupach. I told Ginger to make mine hot and sweet and a slice of Dundee cake or a couple pieces of shortbread wouldn't go amiss. I hadn't eaten since breakfast.  So we ...

[itsmeagain]

sipped sweetened green tea with crushed raspberries and ...

[lunababymoonchild]

I horsed into the largest three course meal ever. Then followed Dundee cake and shortbread. Satiated at last, I felt better and much more calm. “Hunger's guid kitchen!” Ginger laughed. “Aye, I wis famished!” I declared, finally finding my Scottish tongue at last. It wasn't long before I fell asleep in Ginger's comfy armchair staring into his crackling fire and (so I thought) gathering my thoughts. I found myself gently waking up as the sun, unusual at any time of day in Scotland, slowly crept into the room. Stretching and yawning after a very good night's sleep, ………………

[poppy]

the first thing I needed was a hot, sweet cuppa. Ginger was already up and about and the kettle was boiling.

'It's a braw day!' he declared.

Good, I thought, maybe today we'd get to see Aunt Biscuit. 

But first, Ginger again insisted on plying me with mountains of food. At this rate ...

[lunababymoonchild]

I was going to burst! I was slowly remembering why it was I left Scotland in the first place, it was all coming back to me. Nevertheless, I persisted in my mission of at the very least seeing my Aunt Biscuit. So, weighed down by digesting what felt like heavy calories, and it was raining (again?) I asked cousin Ginger to take me to see Auntie Biscuit. Just as I was heaving my food laden self into the car ...........................