Frankie reads 2013

[willoyd]

I like the sound of French Children Don't Throw Food .. I expect it contains a lot of wisdom. From what I saw of them .. French children are very well behaved.[/font]

Ha!! One of the THE great myths: I've now shared hostels/hotels with French families and school groups on at least four occasions in the past nine months and the children have, without exception, been boorish, rude, noisy and an absolute pain to the other guests. The worst was on a recent residential, when there were loads of complaints from nearby residents about food and rubbish being thrown out of the windows, and our children were kept up till all hours by the noise generated in their (the French children's) bedrooms - and as for the posturing and preening.....! I'm not saying all French children are like this by any means (I've come across just as many badly behaved British children, and some beautifully behaved French children), but the claims of books like this are arrant nonsense (sorry - I feel 'quite' strongly about this!!), pandering to the 'grass is always greener' prejudices: they are no better and no worse behaved than any other nationality; just depends on the parents and the children themselves, whatever their nationality. Grrrrrrr!! Edited June 3, 2013 by willoyd

[frankie]

Can't think of any particular title off hand similar, but you might look up Sidney Sheldon's books.  I read a lot of him years ago, and I do believe his books are along some of the same lines as Valley of the Dolls. And in the same era.

 

I always thought Sidney Sheldon was a woman And her books were the chick lit of her time I might have to do a bit of research on his books, thanks

 

The Adventurers isn't about Hollywood, but it is a sort of snapshot of the way some of the South American countries had revolving governments/dictator.  It is told through one families eyes, over several continents and generations.

 

I'm going to keep my eyes open for this book, I'm now intrigued. Thanks for this one as well

 

Patty Duke is a little older than I am I believe.  She had a TV show on back in the late 60's or so about teenage twins...but they were not sisters, they were cousins being raised by the parents of one.  It was funny, and topical, taking place in, I think New York City.  She also played Helen Keller in the 1962 remake of The Miracle Worker. 

 

She did? Oh wow! I've seen the movie, and Patty was amazing in it! I was fully convinced by her performance. What a great movie, too, although very sad in the beginning because no one knew what to do with Helen. Until the miracle worker came along...!

 

Doesn't sound weird at all! Families with a mix of cultures are always interesting and (usually) I find them fairly easygoing. I bet they will be really pleased that you speak English too. Hopefully they will be a big improvement on your last neighbours. 

 

I met the mother in the corridor and said hello, and later in the evening when I was coming home, I also met the father of the mother or the father (I presume he was a grandparent). He looked nice, he smiled and said hello and I reciprocated

 

They must be pretty easygoing, because yesterday morning a lot of their stuff was in the corridor, waiting to get into the apartment. Nothing odd in that... but when they'd had access to the apartment the whole day, and when I came back home in the evening, they had a lot of the stuff still in the corridor, and a load of other stuff scattered around in the yard Of course they are bound to have a lot more stuff than me, a childless singleton, but still, when I move to a new apartment I aim to get all my stuff in at first, and then when it's all in, I start arranging them inside. And while they had their stuff outside and in, in a happy mess, the father (I assume) was very carefreely reading outside in the yard Maybe we could recommend each other books... Maybe I could tip them about French Children Don't Throw Food

 

[frankie]

You could never be weird  I do hope they turn out to be just the right sort of neighbours for you and that they soon get a nice .. not too noisy but very friendly dog 

 

Thanks poppyshake   Well, I don't honestly think we'll make friends or anything, I think most Finnish people keep to themselves and don't get too friendly with the neighbors. They'll say hello when they meet in the corridors, but that's pretty much it, usually. I do like my own privacy as well. I once had a neighbor who kept knocking on my door, asking for things or wanting to give things, and I found her unbearable But she was a real chatterbox and we had nothing in common. Had she been more like myself, who knows, we might've hit it off.

 

But in my wildest 'fantasies' I am more of an extrovert and would like to make friends with neighbors, and be more relaxed about my own personal space...

 

And I don't mind noisy dogs I don't even mind noisy kids that much these days, the last neighbors in the next apartment had a young child who would wake up every night to cry and I would wake up, too, but after a while I got used to it and didn't mind. The mother was such a friendly looking creature and eventhough we only smiled and said hello in the corridor, I was actually sad to see them go, because I never had any problems with them.

 

It's the noisy adults that I mind the most, I think! Which is a bit odd, I used to dislike noisy kids more... Am I becoming old.. Is my biological clock trying to tell me something... Why am I reading a book about child rearing... Oh good god this doesn't sound right...!!!

 

 

I like the sound of French Children Don't Throw Food .. I expect it contains a lot of wisdom. From what I saw of them .. French children are very well behaved.

 

I'm very much enjoying the book and there are things there that I would most definitely want to adopt to my own possible future ventures in raising a child... I'm going to visit a friend in Lahti this Saturday, she was always adamant about not wanting to have children, but then she became a teacher and one day she dropped the bomb on me and told me they'd actually started thinking about wanting kids... When she got married to her hubby, she stopped taking the pill, but wouldn't get her strawberry days after that and for a while she was very worried she might never be able to get pregers... But it was the stress of a lot of other things going on in her life (work stuff) and as soon as that had cleared out, nature took its natural cause and now she's happy to have to use the mensy cup... Where was I... Yes, I've been thinking about how she would probably love this book and find it useful, and I'm thinking she's more likely to have a child before me, so I should do a nice thing and pass my copy along...

 

 

And why the hell do I keep talking about children. Shush now!

 

I read Valley of the Dolls donkey's years ago and loved it .. had forgotten all about it actually so it's great to be reminded .. must re-read it at some point. 

 

I think you would enjoy the re-read. It was very engrossing!

 

I pulled Valley of the Dolls from the shelf.  Unfortunately I also pulled another book, The Rook by Daniel O'Malley off the shelf, ostensibly for husband.  Well, I read the first few pages and tough!  I'm reading it now...

 

Oh no, why didn't your hubby get the book himself, why did you have to go and reach for it Well, Valley of the Dolls can wait, it'll still be there... But what is hubby reading now, I hope he's not just playing with his thumbs, trying to pass the time...

Edited June 4, 2013 by frankie

[frankie]

Ha!! One of the THE great myths: I've now shared hostels/hotels with French families and school groups on at least four occasions in the past nine months and the children have, without exception, been boorish, rude, noisy and an absolute pain to the other guests. The worst was on a recent residential, when there were loads of complaints from nearby residents about food and rubbish being thrown out of the windows, and our children were kept up till all hours by the noise generated in their (the French children's) bedrooms - and as for the posturing and preening.....! I'm not saying all French children are like this by any means (I've come across just as many badly behaved British children, and some beautifully behaved French children), but the claims of books like this are arrant nonsense (sorry - I feel 'quite' strongly about this!!), pandering to the 'grass is always greener' prejudices: they are no better and no worse behaved than any other nationality; just depends on the parents and the children themselves, whatever their nationality. Grrrrrrr!!

 

I think you're referring to the title when you're calling it one of the great myths... I've never met any kids who are either French, American or British, so I can't really say anything on the subject. And of course all parents are individuals, and we have to work the general environment into the equation... However, as this book deals with many different aspects and approaches to child rearing, from the French point of view, I have to say a lot of their methods make sense, and as such, and as discussed by the author, they've seem to be proven effective I don't think the author has just pulled all these methods and examples of how they work out of her own arse

[Athena]

I don't know if it's weird to say this, but I'm really enjoying reading the conversation that's going on here. I believe I shouldn't /couldn't ever have children but I do enjoy reading other people's thoughts and opinions regarding the subjects to do with children and child care. I do enjoy reading about children (even if I couldn't be in the same room as a child for longer than an hour and can't stand their screams and noisyness.). It's strange, in a few years, maybe I'll have a nephew or niece. I mean, I don't know that but it's possible (my siblings both want to have children later on in their lives). It'll be great to meet that person, but also very scary and difficult because children are noisy and I can't be with them for too long. It'll be special to meet someone in the family. If there do are children for my siblings, I really hope for them that they don't inherit much of my condition! Because there are chances of that.. Maybe it's harsh but I wouldn't wish my difficult life upon anyone.

 

frankie, is the book describing the various methods and examples from France or how is it laid out? I'm kind of curious..

 

I've met several French children when I was a child, on campsites for example, when we were on holidays. The children there were always pretty friendly that I remember (that said, so were the Dutch children that I met there. But the Dutch children at my school weren't all so friendly. They bullied me). There's one child in particular that I remember, he lived close by where my grandparents had a little house in France, and when I visited we'd sometimes go there and while the adults talked, we played (my sister and I, and he and his siblings). My sister and I didn't speak much French at those ages and they didn't speak any Dutch, but we managed to all play together.

 

Btw, you're not weird frankie! In my view, you're an awesome person and a great friend . (Coincidentally, the smileys on the forum look more blurry for me since yesterday. Has anyone else noticed this?)

 

EDIT: Hmm, it seems not a problem in Chrome. Very weird.

Edited June 4, 2013 by Athena

[Janet]

My parents were (well, my Mum still is) friends with a couple where he is English and is was French.  She'd been married before (to another Englishman) and had two boys - and they can't speak French at all!      I really can't understand it!  I mean, Francine's English is amazing, but despite the fact that she speaks it most of the time (and only talks to her family - in France and Canada - in French) I can't understand why she didn't speak French to them when they were tiny.  I know other children with parents from two nationalities and both sets of children can speak Spanish/Flemish as well as English.   Seems such a shame to me.

[anisia]

My flat mate's daughter is bilingual. When I first met her, she spoke Polish a lot in the house, and they really pushed her too. Nowadays she speaks English at home too, but both parents speak to her only in Polish. 

It's the same with my cousin's daughter - she was born and lives in Canada. They always speak to her in Romanian, but she mostly speaks English. Understands Romanian perfectly, but she prefers speaking English. 

 

I find bilingual children fascinating! I guess if I stay in the UK and I ever have kids, I do wonder if I'll ever be able to also teach them Romanian. 

[Janet]

I expect you could.     I've heard that children can easily differentiate between languages when they're learning to understand words.

 

On a similar note, we have friends who bought a derelict house in France and have spent the last 20 years restoring it.  They've now moved into it properly and have both got jobs in France and are immersing themselves in it - learning to speak the language really well.   Having known one of them for years, I'm staggered he's done it - but I also think it's absolutely the right thing to have done.  If I was to ever move abroad (unlikely) I'd do my utmost to learn the native language. 

[Karsa Orlong]

A friend of mine has just moved to Liverpool to start teaching English as a foreign language - does that count?

 

[willoyd]

I think you're referring to the title when you're calling it one of the great myths...

Yes, I am.

I've never met any kids who are either French, American or British, so I can't really say anything on the subject. And of course all parents are individuals, and we have to work the general environment into the equation... However, as this book deals with many different aspects and approaches to child rearing, from the French point of view, I have to say a lot of their methods make sense, and as such, and as discussed by the author, they've seem to be proven effective I don't think the author has just pulled all these methods and examples of how they work out of her own arse

I've only dipped in, but the book is marketed on the premise that French children are all immaculately behaved (it doesn't say, for instance, that Most French Children Don't Throw Food, which I appreciate isn't quite as snappy!) and on the implication that others do or, at the very least, that there is something particular to French methods that make French children particularly well behaved. The book quotes from some well respected French experts, but the methods are not peculiarly French, nor are they followed by all, even most, French parents, nor are French children especially well behaved against other nations. (That is not to say that there aren't many well-behaved French children - there are, of course!). Edited June 4, 2013 by willoyd

[pontalba]

 

Frankie wrote: Oh no, why didn't your hubby get the book himself, why did you have to go and reach for it Well, Valley of the Dolls can wait, it'll still be there... But what is hubby reading now, I hope he's not just playing with his thumbs, trying to pass the time...

 

 

Hah, no indeed, he read LeCarre's latest last night, well mostly, he got up early this morning and finished it off. 

 

 

And, just to clarify, he didn't ask me to pull the book, I happened to see it on the shelf and wasn't sure what it was about.  With the name, The Rook, and he being a chess player, I thought it was one he'd want to read.  He'd been debating about what to start. 

Of course it isn't about chess.......lol as I found out.

Edited June 4, 2013 by pontalba

[poppyshake]

Ha!! One of the THE great myths: I've now shared hostels/hotels with French families and school groups on at least four occasions in the past nine months and the children have, without exception, been boorish, rude, noisy and an absolute pain to the other guests. The worst was on a recent residential, when there were loads of complaints from nearby residents about food and rubbish being thrown out of the windows, and our children were kept up till all hours by the noise generated in their (the French children's) bedrooms - and as for the posturing and preening.....! I'm not saying all French children are like this by any means (I've come across just as many badly behaved British children, and some beautifully behaved French children), but the claims of books like this are arrant nonsense (sorry - I feel 'quite' strongly about this!!), pandering to the 'grass is always greener' prejudices: they are no better and no worse behaved than any other nationality; just depends on the parents and the children themselves, whatever their nationality. Grrrrrrr!!

That's put le chat amongst the pigeons Sorry, I was only speaking as I found and also from what I've read in books by ex-pats but I only had a few days experience of French children .. and I've had a lifetime experience of British children (I even was one once ) so it's not fair of me to judge. Last time I went I found there was a marked difference in the behaviour of children in the restaurants, parks, shops and public transport but I'm going again soon and I'll probably find the exact opposite is true.

[willoyd]

That's put le chat amongst the pigeons

LOL

Edited June 4, 2013 by willoyd

[frankie]

I don't know if it's weird to say this, but I'm really enjoying reading the conversation that's going on here. I believe I shouldn't /couldn't ever have children but I do enjoy reading other people's thoughts and opinions regarding the subjects to do with children and child care. I do enjoy reading about children (even if I couldn't be in the same room as a child for longer than an hour and can't stand their screams and noisyness.). It's strange, in a few years, maybe I'll have a nephew or niece. I mean, I don't know that but it's possible (my siblings both want to have children later on in their lives). It'll be great to meet that person, but also very scary and difficult because children are noisy and I can't be with them for too long. It'll be special to meet someone in the family. If there do are children for my siblings, I really hope for them that they don't inherit much of my condition! Because there are chances of that.. Maybe it's harsh but I wouldn't wish my difficult life upon anyone.'

 

It's not weird at all I didn't know that your condition was hereditary, but I don't think it's harsh at all that you don't wish anyone else to have the same condition. I think that's only natural! You know what kinds of difficulties you have had to and have to face and wouldn't wish that on anyone. Still, it doesn't mean that you don't appreciate your life as it is    I think it's great that you have siblings and have the possibility of becoming an aunt. You can then face the nieces and nephews when they are in their best behavior! I hope this doesn't sound cruel or inconsiderate, but you have the perfect 'excuse' not to have to deal with them when they are playing rough and are too rowdy!

 

 

frankie, is the book describing the various methods and examples from France or how is it laid out? I'm kind of curious..

 

Yes, there are different sorts of methods and philosophies and examples of those. I wouldn't even know where to start, there were so many great points to the book. Is it okay if I refrain from going into more detail until I write my review?  

 

 

 

Btw, you're not weird frankie! In my view, you're an awesome person and a great friend .

 

Awww, thank you However, I don't know if I can give away my copy... I want to keep it in case I'm blessed with children some day in the future.... But I think I'll make a note of buying a copy for my friend if/when she gets pregnant I think that's better, because I bet she's still a bit worried about the possibility of ever having children, what with the no-mensies scare she had last year.

 

 

My parents were (well, my Mum still is) friends with a couple where he is English and is was French.  She'd been married before (to another Englishman) and had two boys - and they can't speak French at all!      I really can't understand it!  I mean, Francine's English is amazing, but despite the fact that she speaks it most of the time (and only talks to her family - in France and Canada - in French) I can't understand why she didn't speak French to them when they were tiny.  I know other children with parents from two nationalities and both sets of children can speak Spanish/Flemish as well as English.   Seems such a shame to me.

 

I think that's a damn shame! It's such a priviledge to be able to learn two languages at home, so I can never understand anyone who'd not want that for their children.

 

My flat mate's daughter is bilingual. When I first met her, she spoke Polish a lot in the house, and they really pushed her too. Nowadays she speaks English at home too, but both parents speak to her only in Polish. 

It's the same with my cousin's daughter - she was born and lives in Canada. They always speak to her in Romanian, but she mostly speaks English. Understands Romanian perfectly, but she prefers speaking English. 

 

I find bilingual children fascinating! I guess if I stay in the UK and I ever have kids, I do wonder if I'll ever be able to also teach them Romanian. 

 

Sure you'd be able to teach them Romanian! It's only a matter of your other half speaking English with the children, and you sticking to Romanian with the children. Of course you'll have to speak English with your other half, unless he speaks Romanian, but just as long as you both stick to your respective mother tongues with the kids, it should all be fine

 

I know that if I were ever to pair up with a foreigner, and have children, I would want to teach them Finnish and I would want my other half to teach them his own mother tongue Bloody hell, even the idea of it is almost enough to make me want to find me a foreign man

[frankie]

On a similar note, we have friends who bought a derelict house in France and have spent the last 20 years restoring it.  They've now moved into it properly and have both got jobs in France and are immersing themselves in it - learning to speak the language really well.   Having known one of them for years, I'm staggered he's done it - but I also think it's absolutely the right thing to have done.  If I was to ever move abroad (unlikely) I'd do my utmost to learn the native language. 

 

That sounds really lovely When I had my Italy craze a few years ago, I would hunt for books about Finnish people who moved to Italy and who'd written about making a life for themselves there. (Only I've never got to actually reading the books yet )

 

Of course on needs to learn the language of the country they move to! I couldn't ever imagine moving somewhere and not bothering to learn the language. It would be hella rude to just move to, say, Portugal, and then just speak English to people. Not only would it be rude, but it would seriously deprive me (?) of so many cultural things.

 

A friend of mine has just moved to Liverpool to start teaching English as a foreign language - does that count?

 

 

Do you mean your friend has moved to Liverpool to teach English to immigrants who don't know a word of English?

 

 

Yes, I am.I've only dipped in, but the book is marketed on the premise that French children are all immaculately behaved (it doesn't say, for instance, that Most French Children Don't Throw Food, which I appreciate isn't quite as snappy!) and on the implication that others do or, at the very least, that there is something particular to French methods that make French children particularly well behaved. The book quotes from some well respected French experts, but the methods are not peculiarly French, nor are they followed by all, even most, French parents, nor are French children especially well behaved against other nations. (That is not to say that there aren't many well-behaved French children - there are, of course!).

 

I don't think Druckman is out to say that all French children are immaculately behaved And yes, it's like you said yourself, one has to think of the title very carefully, it needs to be catchy/provocative/interesting. And it may be that the methods are used in other countries as well, I don't think it was claimed anywhere that all these methods were invented by and carried out only by the French The fact that French people do use these methods is the point.

 

You also have to take into account that the author is American and has views on how children are raised in America. And yes, Americans are also individuals, I'm fully aware of that. But quite understandably this book is based on how the American author views the methods of the French, and she says that they are different from some of the American methods. She doesn't say that all French children always obey, behave impeccably and bring no trouble to their parents. However, she has observed with her own eyes how French children behave differently to those American children she has seen. I don't think one can dispute that when one hasn't lived with the author and seen what she has seen Of course, one can keep their own ideas about different things and just think that the author is inventing everything. That is everyone's prerogative. My prerogative is to take the book at face value.

 

Hah, no indeed, he read LeCarre's latest last night, well mostly, he got up early this morning and finished it off. 

 

Well I'm happy he's been able to read something Goodness knows you have enough books to go around...

 

And, just to clarify, he didn't ask me to pull the book, I happened to see it on the shelf and wasn't sure what it was about.  With the name, The Rook, and he being a chess player, I thought it was one he'd want to read.  He'd been debating about what to start. 

Of course it isn't about chess.......lol as I found out.

 

Ah, that makes sense I wonder what it would be like to have someone around who would take out books from the shelves and say 'hey, you could read this now, it's right up your alley'. That would be grand!

 

 

[frankie]

#36

The Secret of Happy Ever After

by Lucy Dillon

 

 

 

Synopsis: The blurb on this was a bit spoilery, the events of the first sentence didn't take place until 50 or so pages, so I thought I wouldn't include it here. Let's just say that this is chick lit, as all Lucy Dillon's books I've read (at least I would categorize it as chick lit). Michelle is a thirtysomething who's just moved from London to escape her old life and is about to establish a life for herself in Longhampton, when her carrot cake gets eaten by a Dalmatian, owned by Anna... The two are quite unlike each other but they bond, and there begins the story.

There are also dogs in the book, and books, so what more could I want

Thoughts: I'd picked this book up from the library last fall, and I thought it would make a great reading, what with there being dogs and a bookshop. But then after just finishing Dillon's Walking Back to Happiness which was a bit … on the bleh side, I almost went and
took this back to the library. Then I thought I must give it a shot, for there are doggies and books there I'm glad I gave it a go!

I found the life situation of the two main characters interesting, I was dying to see what Anna would do with things, how she would
manage, and I was also dying to find out what was the story behind Michelle. What I also found unusual and fun in its way was that some of the characters in the Dillon book I'd just read before this were featured in this book! That reminded me of Stephen King and how he sometimes has different characters feature in a number of his books. Very clever.

Another perk for me was how different books were discussed in this novel, mostly children's books. When I started reading the book I took a look at how many pages there were to the book, something I always do when starting a new novel, and I found out that at the end of the book there was a recommendations list made by Anna. As I was reading on, I became more determined to write down all the titles in Anna's recommendations list The book made me want to go back to re-reading some of the books I read when I was a kid, and what's more, it made me want to re-try some of the Enid Blyton books I tried as a kid and which I didn't like at the time. And I'm dying to read a Malory Towers book!

If you like chick lit, you might like this, and if you also like dogs and books, you might definitely like this!

As a bonus, here's the recommendations list by Anna:

Charlie and the Chocolate Factory by Roald Dahl

James and the Giant Peach by Roald Dahl

In fact, everything by Roald Dahl!

Ballet Shoes by Noel Streatfeild

One Hundred and One Dalmatians and The Starlight Barking by Dodie Smith

What Katy Did by Susan Coolidge

Charlotte's Web, by E. B. White

Tom's Midnight Garden by Philippa Pearce

The Sheep-Pig by Dick King-Smith

Little Women by Louisa May Alcott

The Famous Five by Enid Blyton

Anne of Green Gables by Lucy Maud Montgomery

The Secret Garden and The Little Princess by Frances Hodgson Burnett

Pippi Longstocking by Astrid Lindgren

Peter Rabbit by Beatrice Potter

The Worst Witch by Jill Murphy

Winnie the Pooh by A. A. Milne

Mary Poppins by P. L. Travers

First Term at Malory Towers by Enid Blyton

Harry Potter 1-7 by J. K. Rowling

The Railway Children by Edith Nesbit

The Jungle Book by Rudyard Kipling

Any of the Chalet School series by Elinor Brent-Dyer

Mrs Pepperpot by Alf Prøysen

Madeline by Ludwig Bemelmans

4/5  (I would've given it a 5/5 if I hadn't decided that this year I was going to be a bit more harsh with my ratings)

[willoyd]

You also have to take into account that the author is American and has views on how children are raised in America. And yes, Americans are also individuals, I'm fully aware of that. But quite understandably this book is based on how the American author views the methods of the French, and she says that they are different from some of the American methods.

That's probably the crunch: the title might make a lot more sense in America (I know next to nothing about the way Americans bring their children up!). I don't think it does in Europe.

Incidentally, there's a fair number of reviewers who think that what she claims doesn't apply to the French, but just to one particular social niche - Parisian middle class.

[frankie]

That's probably the crunch: the title might make a lot more sense in America (I know next to nothing about the way Americans bring their children up!). I don't think it does in Europe.

Incidentally, there's a fair number of reviewers who think that what she claims doesn't apply to the French, but just to one particular social niche - Parisian middle class.

 

Fair enough: I think it's safe to say we shall not agree on the views of the books

[frankie]

#37

Thinner

 

by Richard Bachman

 

 

 

 

 

 

Blurb:  'Thinner' – the old gipsy man barely whispered the word. Billy felt the touch of a withered hand, gentle on his cheek.

 

Billy Halleck, prosperous if overweight citizen, happily married, shuddered, then turned angrily away. The old woman's death had been none of his fault. The court had cleared him. She'd just stumbled in front of his car. Now he simply wanted to forget the whole messy business.

Later, when the scales told him he was losing weight, it was what the doctor had ordered. His wife was pleased – as he should have been. But...

'Thinner'

- the word, the old man's curse, had lodged in his mind like a fattening worm, eating away at his flesh, at his reason. And with his despair, came violence.

 

 

Thoughts: I was going to say that I found the premise of the novel interesting, but when was the last time I read a book where I didn't find the premise interesting...

Anyhow. I'm glad I read the book, because it was on my TBR, and I got to know what happened, but otherwise I wasn't all that  bothered. And I don't really have anything else to say about it. So there.

 

1/5

[frankie]

#38

The Captain and the Enemy

by Graham Greene

 

 

 

Blurb: In Graham Greene's final novel a secretive stranger takes Victor Baxter out of a boarding school much like that of Greene's own youth. The “Captain” changes the boy's name to Jim and brings him to London to serve as a surrogate son to a mysterious woman named Liza. Raised in odd, touching circumstances, Jim never comprehends the enduring relationship between the Captain and Liza, and he struggles to understand what love itself is. Although the novel then takes the Captain and Jim into seedy political intrigue in Panama and Nicaragua, it finally returns to the question of what the proofs of human love are. John Auchard's introduction establishes links to Greene's biography as it considers the places in the lost past where themes that preoccupy a character-or a novelist-had their flashes of genesis.

 

Thoughts: I found the blurb promised a lot of things that the novel didn't deliver. I would've liked to find everything out about the Captain and Liza, as well as Victor Baxter, but the novel fell short. I read a bit of the introduction afterwards and it was said that this wasn't Greene's best novels, to say the least. I found nothing wrong with the use of Greene's words and phrases, and the language, but the story, or the ending at least was rushed. Sometimes with a novel the reader's left with unanswered questions, and it's a good thing, but with this I would've liked there to be more answers.

 

2/5

[frankie]

#39

Valley of the Dolls

by Jacqueline Susann

 

 

 

 

'Synopsis': The ones I found online where spoilery, so I guess I have to wing it with this one as well. I guess this is one of those books everyone's heard of, it's a classic of sorts. The reader encounters three different women, and the narrative splits between them. They are all involved in the show business in the United States in one way or another, and I believe it's safe to say that it takes a toll on them in different ways...

 

Thoughts: This is a Rory Gilmore book and it's only for that reason that I bought a cheap copy of this. I knew of the book and the movie, but had no idea what they were about, as they are a bit before my time. I was only going to read it for the RG challenge and I didn't really expect to like the book or be interested in it. Fortunately for me, I was very wrong. I think at first I didn't like the way the story is told from the point of view from the three different main characters, but as I read further I found that it was definitely called for and well orchestrated. I had many different ideas about what the characters were like, and what they might achieve or become, and was thrilled that the author kept me on my toes and that I had no idea in the end how it would all play out. Many unexpected twists! For me, this novel was very readable and engaging and I started to think I really wanted to read more books like this.

This books reminds me of Peyton Place: like I already mentioned to pontalba, the books are classics in their ways, they both have to
deal with relationships, both are RG challenge books, and both my copies are blue Oh, and: I didn't expect to like either book, and
yet I fully enjoyed them both!

 

 

5/5

[Athena]

It's not weird at all I didn't know that your condition was hereditary, but I don't think it's harsh at all that you don't wish anyone else to have the same condition. I think that's only natural! You know what kinds of difficulties you have had to and have to face and wouldn't wish that on anyone. Still, it doesn't mean that you don't appreciate your life as it is    I think it's great that you have siblings and have the possibility of becoming an aunt. You can then face the nieces and nephews when they are in their best behavior! I hope this doesn't sound cruel or inconsiderate, but you have the perfect 'excuse' not to have to deal with them when they are playing rough and are too rowdy!

x

Thank you !

 

@ frankie's review of The Secret of Happy Ever After

This is going on the wishlist!

[frankie]

x

Thank you !

 

You are quite welcome!

 

 

@ frankie's review of The Secret of Happy Ever After

This is going on the wishlist!

 

Great, I hope you enjoy it!

 

*

 

I forgot to mention yesterday: I got some great news yesterday about something I've been worrying about for a few months, so I felt like I deserved a bit of book browsing in celebration I went to the charityshop of Red Cross, and I found one book I had to get I think I was being moderately good, there were more books that I wanted, but nowadays I try to limit my book buying to books that I can see myself really wanting to read within a year's time.

 

The book I found was a real surprise: it was Ghost Story by Jim Butcher! It's a book in his Dresden Files -series, something I've been meaning to and wanting to get into for a while now. The first novel in the series, Storm Front, is actually one of the books in my sci-fi/fantasy challenge, challenge list given to me by Steve I sent a wishful note to the library in January, to ask if they could get a copy of SF for the library, but unfortunately they haven't yet, so I need to buy the book myself some time. It's pretty high on my wishlist, and probably the only reason why I haven't acquired it yet is that it's a series, and if I really love the book I'd then have to go and buy a bunch of the books, and I haven't had the money for that.

 

It's supposed to be a really great series, I think Steve's said that it's a bit like the Dexter series but with fantasy elements. And if you know me, you know I love Dexter So it's all the more convincing when Steve finally read the first Dexter book and really enjoyed it.

 

However, it was rather unfortunate that when I came home, I googled the book series and found out that the book I'd found was the thirteenth book in the series...  

[Athena]

That's great, frankie! Storm Front is on my wishlist too. It's a shame your library doesn't have it ><. It's not nice that the one you found is the thirteenth book in the series (personally, I think it'd be helpful if they printed that kind of information on the cover or on one of the first pages in the book), I guess now at least you have it for a cheap price. I hope you find the other ones too (cheap too maybe?), so you can read the whole series (at some point at least). Maybe you could ask some books for your birthday? (I'm not sure when your birthday is tbh , it might be a long time until then )

[frankie]

#40

French Children Don't Throw Food

 

by Pamela Druckerman

 

 

 

 

Blurb: The book everyone is talking about. How the French manage to raise well-behaved children, and have a life!

• How come French babies sleep through the night?  

• Why do French children happily eat what is put in front of them?   

• How can French mothers chat to their friends while their children play quietly?

• Why are French mothers more likely to be seen in skinny jeans than tracksuit bottoms?

Thoughts: This is the first book in a long long time that I've purchased from the local bookshop, for full price. Some time ago when I'd solved my financial problems, I felt I had to treat myself to a book should I find something interesting in the bookshop, and when I couldn't find anything I wanted in the English fiction section, I went to browse my second favorite section of the bookshop: memoirs/bios etc. This book stood out for me because of the great title, and the beautiful cover. I read the blurb and looked in between the pages and eventhough I wasn't definitely looking for any child rearing guide books, I couldn't help but be very much intrigued by the book and I thought I might learn something useful, and in any case I would learn about French people. As you see, I happened to catch Rachael Ray (though I can't stand her    ) interviewing an author about her book called What French Women Know: About Love, Sex, and Other Matters of the Heart and Mind. I had never been too interested in France or the people, but the author, Debra Ollivier, was well spoken and she made a lot of great points, and ever since then I've wanted to read the book and find more on the subject. So I figured that maybe I ought to read this book as an introductory to some things French, and had to buy it

 

The author is an American who's living in France with her British husband, and in the book she discusses her own ventures in child rearing, and the advice, tips and child rearing 'philosophy' the French offer her. She compares their stories to the American and British ways, and it made really interesting reading. Not only when it comes to children and how to raise them, but other cultural customs, too! As you know I'm still single and have no children, but as I'm getting older I've started to think about how I would like to raise my own possible children in the future. I've often thought about the way I was raised myself, and I've actually started keeping a little list of things I would do differently with my own kids. And from this book I learned a lot of new things, which I would definitely want to incorporate in my strategies. It was also interesting to think about how Finns would do in similar situations, when reading about Anglophone and Francophone ways.

How children 'ought' to be raised is a rather topical theme here in Finland these days. I think a lot of people are worried about how the youth today seem more arrogant, selfish and disrespectful, and I think many people would say that these days children aren't made more accountable for their behavior. It's a rather common thing to hear people say something like 'and to think that the kids of today will be the ones who will be making the decisions in the future, and taking 'care' of us in our retirement homes'. I don't mean to say all children and teenagers are the same, of course.

This book is definitely for keeps, and personally I would recommend it to anyone who is keen to learn about different sorts of
methods of 'educating' (as the French would say) children.

 

More detailed description in the spoilers in case anyone is interested!

 

 

 

I don't really know where to start, there was so much in the book!

I'll go over the prologue, quoting the book (not to the full extent):

When my daughter is eighteen months old, my husband and I decide to take her on a little summer holiday. We pick a coastal town that's a few hours by train from Paris, where we've been living […] We quickly discover that two restaurant meals a day, with a toddler, deserve to be their own circle of hell […] within a few minutes [bean] starts spilling salt shakers and tearing apart sugar packets, then demanding to be sprung from her high chair so she can dash around the restaurant and bolt dangerously towards the docks. Our strategy is to finish the meal quickly. […]

After a few more restaurant meals, I notice that the French families all around us don't look like they're in hell. Weirdly, they look like they're on holiday. French children the same age as Bean are sitting contentedly in their high chairs, waiting for their food or eating fish and even vegetables. There's no shrieking or whining. […]

Are French kids just genetically calmer than ours? Have they been bribed (or threatened) into submission? Are they on the receiving end of an old-fashioned seen-but-not-heard parenting philosophy? It doesn't seem like it. The French children all around us don't look cowed.  They're cheerful, chatty and curious. […]

Once I start thinking about French parenting, I realize it's not just mealtimes that are different. I suddenly have lots of question. Why is it, for example, that in the hundreds of hours I've clocked at French playgrounds, I've never seen a child (except my own) throw a temper tantrum? […] Why is it that so many of the Anglophone kids I meet are on mono-diets of pasta or white rice, or eat only a narrow menu of 'children's' foods? Meanwhile, my daughter's French friends eat fish, vegetables, and practically everything else. […]

French parents are very concerned about their kids. They know about paedophiles, allergies and choking hazards. They take reasonable precautions. But somehow they aren't panicked about their children's well-being. This calmer outlook seems to make them better at both establishing boundaries and giving their kids some autonomy. [...]

By the end of our ruined beach holiday, I've decided to figure out what French parents are doing differently. […]

I realize I'm onto something when I discover a research study led by an economist at Princeton, in which mothers in Columbus, Ohio, said childcare was more than twice as unpleasant as comparable mothers in the city of Rennes, France, did. Or to put it more positively, while the French mums were doing childcare, they spent more of that time in a pleasant state. […]

I start stashing a notebook in my nappy bag. Every doctor's visit, dinner party, play date and puppet show becomes a chance to observe French parents in action, and to figure out what unspoken rules they're following. At first […] [m]ost parents I speak to insist that they're not doing anything special. […] But I'm struck that, despite individual differences, French parents all seem to follow the same basic principles. […]

Why France? I certainly don't suffer from a pro-France bias. Au contraire, I'm not even sure that I like living here. I certainly don't want my kids growing up sniffy Parisians. […]

Yet somehow, the French have managed to be involved without becoming obsessive. They assume that even good parents aren't at the constant service of their children, and that there's no need to feel guilty about this. 'For me, the evenings are for the parents,' one Parisian mother tells me. 'My daughter can be with us if she wants, but it's adult time.' French parents want their kids to be stimulated, but not continually. […]

When I ask French parents how they discipline their children, it takes them a few beats just to understand what I mean. 'Ah, you mean how do we educate them,' they ask. Discipline, I soon realize, is a narrow, seldom-used term that refers to punishment, whereas éducation (which has nothing to do with school) is something they imagine themselves to be doing all the time. […]

 

That's the premise for the book. In the book Druckerman discusses for example getting children to sleep through their nights. The trick is that when the child makes a noise, one is to wait and observe the child for a while to see if he's just making noises in his sleep, or if he's fully woken up. One's not to jump up and pick up the child because that might wake him up from his REM sleep. According to the French, they expect their children to sleep through the whole night by the time they are six months old, and most babies really do that.

Another example is that the French do not go about instantly catering to the needs of the children. If a child needs, for example, attention when the mother is speaking on the phone, she will tell the child to wait until she has finished her phone call. She doesn't tell the other person on the phone that she has to go and attend to the child. This, and lots of other things (like having a set meal time schedule for children) make children have to wait for things, and therefore Druckerman concludes that “making children delay gratification – as French parents do – actually makes them calmer and more resilient[.] Whereas Anglophone children, who are in general more used to getting what they want right away, go to pieces under stress[.]” And therefore “...even these small delays seem to make a big difference. I'm now convinced that the secret of why French kids don't whine (well, hardly ever) and don't often collapse into tantrums is that they've developed the internal sources to cope with frustration.”

These are only just a few examples. If those seem to make sense to you and you are interested in finding out more, I would heartily recommend getting a copy of the book

 

 

4/5

Edited June 26, 2013 by frankie