itsmeagain Posted March 26, 2015 Posted March 26, 2015 "Let's be frank, Frank", pleaded the smoking damaged voice, "We are an agency that negotiates weddings..we want eligible gentlemen.." "I will have you know I am totally eligible..only the other day I read on a news article, the fact is I will be due extra benefits of five quid a month soon..long term .." "Sir I will send you a brochure, but we want attractive working men on this ship. We do not promote dole here my dear" rasped the unknown haggard smoker. "Sydney not Frank by the way!!" fumed Sydney indignantly., " so in the brochure I want to see topless blondes."
poppy Posted March 26, 2015 Posted March 26, 2015 'What's that?? Jobless mongs, you say? We don't allow any of that sort of discriminatory language here, sir!!' and she hung up in his ear. Sydney felt despondent, would he ever find the love of his life to share his bedsit and pet ferret? He may as well just sit round in his underwear all day, adding to his cider bottle collection as funds allowed and eating one minute noodles. Just then the doorbell rang and .....
itsmeagain Posted March 27, 2015 Posted March 27, 2015 (edited) it was"Birthday surprise big man..I am Aleesha, local escort provided by Silly sollipsisms.com, you won a. . Edited March 27, 2015 by itsmeagain
poppy Posted March 27, 2015 Posted March 27, 2015 prize in Scrumpy's Scrumptious Cider Competition. I will be your escort for the night. To get the ball rolling, let's .....
itsmeagain Posted March 27, 2015 Posted March 27, 2015 take you through to your bedroom, where you will get undressed.." " But err err .." Sydney gasped in fear as she
poppy Posted March 29, 2015 Posted March 29, 2015 grabbed him by the hand and dragged him towards the bedroom door. "It's alright, I'm not going to ravish you, but you really need to put on a few more clothes if we're going out for a night on the town. How do you expect to cut a dash dressed in your long-johns? Oh dear, is this all you've got? Mustard trousers and purple shirts? I can see we'll need to do a little bit of retail therapy first. Come on then, let's .....
itsmeagain Posted March 29, 2015 Posted March 29, 2015 get out to the shops" . "Hold on now, unknown lady..what`s your name? Round here even if a lady of the night we want to know her name..now what.....
poppy Posted March 29, 2015 Posted March 29, 2015 do you call yourself?' Aleesha drew herself up to her full height of 5 foot and stomping her foot, said most indignantly, 'I'm no lady of the night, I'll have you know, I'm a perfectly respectable single girl whose job it is to escort Scrumpy's Scrumptious Cider competition winners on a night on the town. No funny business included!' Sydney look shamefaced, and apologised profusely. He was starting to like this feisty little blonde and decided to ....
itsmeagain Posted March 30, 2015 Posted March 30, 2015 go along with ludicrous cider façade. I mean, as all practical minded blokes knew, feisty blondes were a challenge. He was thinking if he plays his cards correctly then he will be in a situation that those in the know may call compromising. The more compromising the better. "Now those clothes, get to a good shop and buy some plus fours lad, and get thee some braces on your back. Moreover, anyone dressing very smartly gets my vote", Aleesha declared, tempting Sydney to declare his..
poppy Posted March 31, 2015 Posted March 31, 2015 long-standing aversion to plus-fours and braces. But he bit his tongue and meekly followed her to the department store where ....
itsmeagain Posted April 1, 2015 Posted April 1, 2015 a pair of green braces, and white plus fours, were bought. He looked 84, not 34. Brilliant, declared Aleesha. Now come with me, your prize awaits. You were, of course, expecting..
poppy Posted April 1, 2015 Posted April 1, 2015 a slap-up meal at the local hostelry, The Startled Chook, but I have more of a treat for you than that. No, we will be attending the event of the year, The Country Women's Institute fancy dress ball, no less! You will be my Gatsby and I will be your Daisy. What do you think of that?'
itsmeagain Posted April 1, 2015 Posted April 1, 2015 (edited) "The great Gatsby? I must say I am of course handsome, sufficiently to carry it off", declared Sydney, arrogant and insouciant as ever. "I shall agree, on condition that you and I get.... Edited April 1, 2015 by itsmeagain
poppy Posted April 2, 2015 Posted April 2, 2015 a few quick ballroom dancing lessons. I'm sure they'll ask us to lead off the dancing, we'll be the handsomest couple there!' Aleesha had her doubts, but decided to .....
itsmeagain Posted April 2, 2015 Posted April 2, 2015 humour the young buffoon for a while. After all, she mused silently, it's not...
poppy Posted April 3, 2015 Posted April 3, 2015 every day that someone so unprepossessing showed such a strange magnetism. He scrubbed up surprisingly well and she wondered if ....
itsmeagain Posted April 4, 2015 Posted April 4, 2015 indeed there may be more to it than meets the eye."Right, grab my waist and dance", expressed Aleesha , emphatically. "A good old dance is good food for the soul and I also want to see you shake and shimmy dear old Syd..you do well for a guy of your age" "I am....just..34.." said Sydney, attempting to
poppy Posted April 4, 2015 Posted April 4, 2015 suck his stomach in, which had developed quite a bulge from his cider drinking ways. 'Really??' said Aleesha. 'That makes quite a difference then, I thought you were all of ....
itsmeagain Posted April 4, 2015 Posted April 4, 2015 83 and several days.Amazing isn't it, how things and times have a habit of aging people? Only last week I told my husband of the.....
poppy Posted April 5, 2015 Posted April 5, 2015 ('Husband!' thought Syd, 'Drats!') ....of the dangers in letting yourself go, not keeping up a rigorous fitness regime and I'm a firm believer in the raw cabbage juice diet myself. If you like to put yourself into my hands (Syd perked up a little at the sound of this) I could have you .....
itsmeagain Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 looking 36 @nd 7 months three days , in less than 3 months six days. You will need to do everything I say." "Where have I heard that before?", thought Sydney, a tinge of excitement coursing through him, "..oh yes..well enough said..better not tell her about it or shes going to abandon me."
poppy Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 The last time he'd put himself into a woman's hands he'd ended up drugged with his wallet missing, but he had vague recollections of a very good time in between. He didn't think he should really share the experience with Aleesha, she looked ...
itsmeagain Posted April 6, 2015 Posted April 6, 2015 stern and unforgiving, which excited Sydney considerably. He thought he must act indifferent, for best results. "Do your worst old l@ss, " he grunted, feigning nonchalance.
poppy Posted April 7, 2015 Posted April 7, 2015 And after tasting the cabbage/dandelion/comfrey juice concoction she handed to him, he suspected she had! 'Down the hatch, me lad, in no time you won't know yourself! Next up's the fitness regime.' Judging by the way he felt after drinking it ....
itsmeagain Posted April 8, 2015 Posted April 8, 2015 he surmised that, perchance, he may depart his natural life in an hour ..or a minute. "Now, a one , a two, a one, a two, a one..." declared Aleesha, grabbing his...
Recommended Posts