I'm pretty sure I'd know all of those if I listened to them. My Dad owned the Davy Crockett record.
He used to buy records from second hand shops and we had such delights as Abdul Abulbul Amir; Oh, What a Face; Anton Karas playing the zither and Winifred Atwell on piano, whose style he liked to imitate.
Like Kev, I have no idea what the most popular songs are now.
'What's tofu, when it's home? Never heard of it! Bacon and beans is what we have, constricted by our very own Burt. Now, have you picked up any inseminating information from the cutting room?'
'Well.... I did hear Daisy Clutterbuck say to Betty Bootles that she'd overheard ...
and most earnestly swear, first and foremost, irregardless of the fact, notwithstanding, at this point in time, all things being equal, and I'm unanimous in this ...
That's a strange place to keep a lemon!' I gasped.
'Just a little party trick I learned in my younger days,' said Millie, preening herself.
'Fascinating. Now back to the question at hand. Do you or do you not want me to continue investigating Harry's Hats?'
'Well ...
slowly said, 'I don't think so, I never employ more than three.'
She perched her pince-nez glasses on her nose, which she'd previously eschewed due to an inflated sense of vanity, and peered at me closely.
'You don't look anything like Johnny Revolting! You're a downright composter!'
There was only one thing to do ...and I did it.
sometime in the late 70's, I thought. Born in the East End, father a dog food taster, mother a canine obedience trainer, several siblings involved in doggy punk hairstyling. Proponent of the Oi! punk style ... there my memory failed me. I hoped I could keep up the pretence but the way Millie was looking at me I doubted ...
clutched her pearls and stuttered 'John...John Rev..Rev..Revolting??' She swooned and if it hadn't been for the muscular arm of Burt reaching out to grab her, she would have ...
hid behind Burt who was the largest.
'Whom is responsible for this ... this ...despicable defecation??' she shrieked, showing not only a poor grasp of grammar but a tendency towards malapropisms.
'Him!' the three stooges shouted, all pointing at ...
swishing backwards and forwards in a way that would make any filly happy. Unfortunately, due to my enthusiasm, I totally forgot about the candles and next thing my pride and joy went up in flames. During the mayhem that followed ...