Athena Posted August 6, 2019 Share Posted August 6, 2019 I'm currently reading a Dutch book about introverts (Ik moet nog even kijken of ik kan by Liesbeth Smit). We have a topic on Introverts in the Debate Forum, but it was Kylie's personal thread and I wanted to include a poll, so I thought I'd start a new topic. For those looking for the old topic, here it is. I haven't finished the book I'm reading yet, but I'd love to know if you feel you're an introvert, extravert, ambivert or something else. Feel free to vote in the poll and / or comment if you feel comfortable with that. For myself, I'm very much an introvert. I also am autistic and have ADD, so I have to really limit the amount of input signals I get every day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hayley Posted August 6, 2019 Share Posted August 6, 2019 I honestly didn't know ambivert was a word until I saw this! I'm definitely an introvert. In social situations I'd much rather just listen than feel I have to speak and if I've spent a lot of time with other people, even if it was really lovely to see them, I start to crave quiet time by myself. What does your book say about introverts @Athena? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bookmonkey Posted August 6, 2019 Share Posted August 6, 2019 I'm definitely an introvert. I much prefer time on my own than with others. Luckily my job is about 85% on my own in my own office, with minimal contact with others. That little contact I do have is just enough for me. Occasionally I cover reception, and after an hour or so of having that contact with other people I start to feel a little nuts, and need to be on my own again. My favourite time is the evening when I'm at home on my own reading. Now I live on my own it's even better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Madeleine Posted August 7, 2019 Share Posted August 7, 2019 (edited) also definitely an introvert. Work is very lively, thanks to an open plan office, there are about 35 or so of us plus various other people who work at the desks in the open area, and sometimes there can be a meeting taking place as well, you can't hear yourself think sometimes. Add to that traffic noise and the racket from the building across the road that's being renovated..... then noisy public transport on the way home - the bus can be a nightmare - and when I do get home I need to recover sometimes! thank goodness it's summer (sort of ) and I can potter about in the garden if it's not raining. I'm also not that mad about large gatherings, I prefer a few friends at a time, otherwise I never get to catch up with anyone as it's too noisy or everyone's too busy talking to everyone else. Everywhere seems so noisy nowadays, sigh. Edited August 7, 2019 by Madeleine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bookmonkey Posted August 7, 2019 Share Posted August 7, 2019 6 hours ago, Madeleine said: also definitely an introvert. Work is very lively, thanks to an open plan office, there are about 35 or so of us plus various other people who work at the desks in the open area, and sometimes there can be a meeting taking place as well, you can't hear yourself think sometimes. Add to that traffic noise and the racket from the building across the road that's being renovated..... then noisy public transport on the way home - the bus can be a nightmare - and when I do get home I need to recover sometimes! thank goodness it's summer (sort of ) and I can potter about in the garden if it's not raining. I'm also not that mad about large gatherings, I prefer a few friends at a time, otherwise I never get to catch up with anyone as it's too noisy or everyone's too busy talking to everyone else. Everywhere seems so noisy nowadays, sigh. That sort of workplace would drive me nuts Madeleine. I used to work in an open plan office, but only about 10-15 people max, but it was still sometimes too much interaction for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Athena Posted August 8, 2019 Author Share Posted August 8, 2019 On 8/6/2019 at 7:08 PM, Hayley said: I honestly didn't know ambivert was a word until I saw this! I'm definitely an introvert. In social situations I'd much rather just listen than feel I have to speak and if I've spent a lot of time with other people, even if it was really lovely to see them, I start to crave quiet time by myself. What does your book say about introverts @Athena? Pretty much that, yes! It also says that in the brain, introverts and extraverts are differently wired and that genetics play a large role in it (rather than upbringing). On 8/7/2019 at 12:39 AM, bookmonkey said: I'm definitely an introvert. I much prefer time on my own than with others. Luckily my job is about 85% on my own in my own office, with minimal contact with others. That little contact I do have is just enough for me. Occasionally I cover reception, and after an hour or so of having that contact with other people I start to feel a little nuts, and need to be on my own again. My favourite time is the evening when I'm at home on my own reading. Now I live on my own it's even better. I'm glad you have a lot of time where you can be on your own . 15 hours ago, Madeleine said: also definitely an introvert. Work is very lively, thanks to an open plan office, there are about 35 or so of us plus various other people who work at the desks in the open area, and sometimes there can be a meeting taking place as well, you can't hear yourself think sometimes. Add to that traffic noise and the racket from the building across the road that's being renovated..... then noisy public transport on the way home - the bus can be a nightmare - and when I do get home I need to recover sometimes! thank goodness it's summer (sort of ) and I can potter about in the garden if it's not raining. I'm also not that mad about large gatherings, I prefer a few friends at a time, otherwise I never get to catch up with anyone as it's too noisy or everyone's too busy talking to everyone else. Everywhere seems so noisy nowadays, sigh. That sounds like a difficult place to work for an introvert! I'm glad it helps you to spend time in your garden doing gardening things . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chrissy Posted August 8, 2019 Share Posted August 8, 2019 I've had to 'tick' Other on the list! Although I wouldn't call myself an introvert, I don't I am particularly extrovert either, and the term ambivert seemed to suggest that you would swing between the two. I can be social enough when I have to be (not centre of attention though), but I MUST have regular alone time. I live a quiet life, and love it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~Andrea~ Posted August 8, 2019 Share Posted August 8, 2019 (edited) On 06/08/2019 at 6:08 PM, Hayley said: I honestly didn't know ambivert was a word until I saw this! I'm definitely an introvert. In social situations I'd much rather just listen than feel I have to speak and if I've spent a lot of time with other people, even if it was really lovely to see them, I start to crave quiet time by myself. Yes this is me too! I prefer to chip in to a conversation rather than dominate it. I need a lot of space and I love living alone as I get to control how much 'people' time I have. I don't mind being in the spotlight now and again as long as it passes over me pretty quicky! Too much attention and I can feel the need to hide! Oddly most of my friends are fairly extrovert so I do tend to get on with extroverts quite well! Perhaps it works because there's less talking for me to do!! Even though I'm more of a listener than a talker I can find a lot of listening quite draining. Sometimes this is a problem when I'm with particularly chatty person and can't get a word in, I feel like it's information overload! I sometimes I find I'm such an introvert that I forget I do need company now and again and have to consciously stop myself from being a hermit! 2 hours ago, Chrissy said: I've had to 'tick' Other on the list! Although I wouldn't call myself an introvert, I don't I am particularly extrovert either, and the term ambivert seemed to suggest that you would swing between the two. I can be social enough when I have to be (not centre of attention though), but I MUST have regular alone time. I live a quiet life, and love it! I don't think your vote registered as the poll is showing the forum to be 100% introvert at the moment Edited August 8, 2019 by ~Andrea~ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chrissy Posted August 8, 2019 Share Posted August 8, 2019 2 hours ago, ~Andrea~ said: I don't think your vote registered as the poll is showing the forum to be 100% introvert at the moment I had clicked the poll button, but not the submit! This is an interesting subject to discuss. It makes you consider who you are as a person. I use to be apologetic for needing alone time and quiet time etc. but as I get older the more I recognise my own deeply felt needs and the less I care about what others think of them! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bookmonkey Posted August 8, 2019 Share Posted August 8, 2019 I think I've got more introverted as I've got older. When I was younger I would be with groups of people a lot more, and not seem to mind. I didn't mind being alone, but didn't crave it as much as I do now. Now I find I really need to be alone a lot more, and really don't like being with large groups very much. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted August 9, 2019 Share Posted August 9, 2019 17 hours ago, Chrissy said: I've had to 'tick' Other on the list! Although I wouldn't call myself an introvert, I don't I am particularly extrovert either, and the term ambivert seemed to suggest that you would swing between the two. I can be social enough when I have to be (not centre of attention though), but I MUST have regular alone time. I live a quiet life, and love it! I was torn between introvert and ambivert. I prefer to be by myself but also enjoy talking with people. Like Andrea I'm more comfortable with extroverts as I don't particularly like talking about myself. I always find others far more interesting than myself anyway But too much chatter leaves me drained and befuddled Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Madeleine Posted August 9, 2019 Share Posted August 9, 2019 Looks like we intros are winning! I've never heard of an ambivert either, interesting term. I don't mind being with extroverts but sometimes they can be a bit overpowering - depends on their personality but some people can be domineering, and exhausting to be with after a while! Not such a bad thing, we're all different after all and you have to have a balance of the different types of personality. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted August 12, 2019 Share Posted August 12, 2019 On 09/08/2019 at 3:42 AM, poppy said: I was torn between introvert and ambivert. I prefer to be by myself but also enjoy talking with people. Like Andrea I'm more comfortable with extroverts as I don't particularly like talking about myself. I always find others far more interesting than myself anyway But too much chatter leaves me drained and befuddled Interesting Poppy. I am an introvert but can truly express myself with people I am comfy with. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted August 13, 2019 Share Posted August 13, 2019 7 hours ago, itsmeagain said: Interesting Poppy. I am an introvert but can truly express myself with people I am comfy with. That's true Sean, it's easy to be chatty with close friends and family, I was more thinking of talking with strangers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted August 13, 2019 Share Posted August 13, 2019 In which case I am ok, but prefer avoiding it . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Madeleine Posted August 14, 2019 Share Posted August 14, 2019 That's true Sean, it's easy to be chatty with close friends and family, I was more thinking of talking with strangers. Me too, not at all good with strangers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marie H Posted August 14, 2019 Share Posted August 14, 2019 I am an introvert, and I think that I have always been an introvert, especially as a child. As I get older (I'm 54 years old) I need more quiet time for my self, just to cope with life, in general. I don't think that that is a bad thing; I just feel that I look at life from a different angle from most people. I find that most peoples lives are so chaotic and frenetic, and quite often aggressive with others around them. On 8/9/2019 at 12:06 AM, bookmonkey said: I think I've got more introverted as I've got older. When I was younger I would be with groups of people a lot more, and not seem to mind. I didn't mind being alone, but didn't crave it as much as I do now. Now I find I really need to be alone a lot more, and really don't like being with large groups very much. That is exactly how I feel too! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted August 14, 2019 Share Posted August 14, 2019 4 hours ago, Madeleine said: That's true Sean, it's easy to be chatty with close friends and family, I was more thinking of talking with strangers. Me too, not at all good with strangers. I can talk confidently in meetings with strangers; I have no wish to entertain people who wish to tell the world about their ideas etc. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted August 15, 2019 Share Posted August 15, 2019 19 hours ago, itsmeagain said: I can talk confidently in meetings with strangers; I have no wish to entertain people who wish to tell the world about their ideas etc. That's a very valuable skill to have! I become a nervous wreck if I have to address a group (fortunately it's not something I'm called on to do now) but I'm ok just talking casually in a group. (memo to self ... don't bring up latest brainwaves with itsmeagain ... whoops) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Athena Posted August 15, 2019 Author Share Posted August 15, 2019 I find it very difficult to talk with strangers, it tires me extremely. For me, the more people there are in the group, the less I'll say (even when you average it). Also, the more people there are, the more tiring it gets for me. I find it scary to talk in groups too, Poppy! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marie H Posted August 17, 2019 Share Posted August 17, 2019 On 15/08/2019 at 4:22 PM, Athena said: I find it very difficult to talk with strangers, it tires me extremely. For me, the more people there are in the group, the less I'll say (even when you average it). Also, the more people there are, the more tiring it gets for me. I find it scary to talk in groups too, Poppy! This is exactly how I feel too. A group of extroverts, plus small talk, are the most unpleasant social experiences I have had. It always makes me feel like I am an alien, lost on a strange planet. In these social situations, I just want to disappear, and hope that the host has pets that I can have a conversation with! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Athena Posted August 17, 2019 Author Share Posted August 17, 2019 15 minutes ago, Marie H said: This is exactly how I feel too. A group of extroverts, plus small talk, are the most unpleasant social experiences I have had. It always makes me feel like I am an alien, lost on a strange planet. In these social situations, I just want to disappear, and hope that the host has pets that I can have a conversation with! It's nice to know I'm not the only one who feels this way . Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marie H Posted August 17, 2019 Share Posted August 17, 2019 8 minutes ago, Athena said: It's nice to know I'm not the only one who feels this way . It's good for introverts to share their experiences, in a comfortable and friendly forum, like BCF, and know that we are not alone. 14 minutes ago, Athena said: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Quinn Posted August 18, 2019 Share Posted August 18, 2019 I'm an introvert. For those of you who might be familiar with MBTI, I'm an INFP. I find it interesting -- but not surprising, I suppose -- that so many of the respondents are introverts. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted August 18, 2019 Share Posted August 18, 2019 (edited) On 15/08/2019 at 10:27 AM, poppy said: That's a very valuable skill to have! I become a nervous wreck if I have to address a group (fortunately it's not something I'm called on to do now) but I'm ok just talking casually in a group. (memo to self ... don't bring up latest brainwaves with itsmeagain ... whoops) You are ok Bron.😆😁 Not aimed at you; the scenario is the stranger sidling up in a pub or a train, especially if drunk. Expert on everything, knows nothing.. and you are about to listen.😊☺️🤩 Edited August 18, 2019 by itsmeagain Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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