itsmeagain Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 that 1 in 12,000 UK citizens has Onduty in their genes, or as my Aunt Maud says"What's in the jeans is more crucial than what's in the genes". Dex nodded sagely, he Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted January 18, 2015 Share Posted January 18, 2015 had always been a great believer in that maxim, although he thought it was 'What's in the gins is more important than what's in the jeans'. He could do with a stiff gin now, he thought, after the latest shocking news. And it might help get rid of the foul taste of sheep bollock pasties, the old crone had practically forced on him. So reeling from a combination of the news and a distinct inclination to throw up, he ............ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted January 19, 2015 Share Posted January 19, 2015 walked outside, ambled hesitantly down a backstreet, and a sight took his attention away from his current woes. An old Rediffusion television , in a 2nd hand shop window, was showing.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted January 20, 2015 Share Posted January 20, 2015 re-runs of Law and Order. Dex stood mersmerized and failed to see ....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted January 20, 2015 Share Posted January 20, 2015 Benji Bothroyd, 18, satchel thief extraordinaire. Benji crept up... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted January 22, 2015 Share Posted January 22, 2015 with the stealth and sneakiness of a flea in your undies. Unfortunately for Benji, this highly developed skill was of no use whatsoever in this instance, as Dex carried no satchel. He did however have with him ............ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted January 22, 2015 Share Posted January 22, 2015 (edited) A box of tissues; carried along for a certain hoped for eventuality; a pack of ... Edited January 22, 2015 by itsmeagain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted January 23, 2015 Share Posted January 23, 2015 extra stong mints, The Little Pocket Book of Foreign Words and Phrases and four rather worse for wear sausage rolls. Benji didn't know the pickings were really very slim, of course, and he ..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted January 23, 2015 Share Posted January 23, 2015 (edited) steadfastly failed to accept the unacceptable, ie that Benji was a slovenly, ugly little thief and an utter loser. Full of self esteem, he lurched forward, slipping a hand into the back pocket of Dex's finest pair of pantaloons. "Hey there, miscreant" raged Dex, indignantly. Edited January 23, 2015 by itsmeagain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted January 26, 2015 Share Posted January 26, 2015 'unhand me you beast and keep your grubby, over-familiar, sticky little mitts off me!' Of course, Benji didn't take the slightest bit of notice and by the time Dex had finished his heated words, he'd made off down a dark alley with Dex's wallet neatly lifted. Dex decided ..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted January 26, 2015 Share Posted January 26, 2015 to catch up with Benji later, but for now he needs the police."Police, help", he yelled stridently.The police Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted January 27, 2015 Share Posted January 27, 2015 ignored him. 'Blutty foreigners,' one policeman muttered to another, 'no manners. Neber a please or a fank you!' Dex ran over and tugged one by the sleeve, 'That ....that sneaky little ....sneak thief ....he just stole my wallet!!' 'And what you wanting me to do about it man?' Dex spluttered and gabbled, 'What the ..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted January 27, 2015 Share Posted January 27, 2015 blooming blazes!! Do you mean that in this age and day, the police of this land are.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dex Posted January 28, 2015 Share Posted January 28, 2015 Just as useless as the ones back home, I came here to enjoy the joys of a real International City and just like at home, you get this happening to you! He made some more frantic gestures and gave up, B***** L********, Dunt yow spek the quayns, Englisch or wot... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted January 28, 2015 Share Posted January 28, 2015 (edited) The police were mystified by Dex asking about the Queen and her English. "Well as you know, the queen is English, do you expect me to talk like her?" asked PC James Herbert of Kingston police.Dex Edited January 28, 2015 by itsmeagain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 gave up and resigned himself to the fact that there'd be no beersies for him tonight! How he'd get on without his credit card, driver's licence and passport didn't bear thinking about. Luckily, who should saunter by, but Itsme, out for a little postprandial stroll. He ......... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted January 29, 2015 Share Posted January 29, 2015 had left Anna and poppy together on a country road, sallying bravely forth to the centre of Kingston."Itsme do help me ", called Dex, plaintively. Itsme saw Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 a promising looking watering hole, The Drunken Fruitbat, and veered off in that direction, completely ...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted February 1, 2015 Share Posted February 1, 2015 (edited) at ease, alongside Dex, the two of them talking of books, travel and life. "Hey fellas" called Poppy,..... Edited February 1, 2015 by itsmeagain Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted February 4, 2015 Share Posted February 4, 2015 we got a bit lost. I think Anna had the map upside down. What a stroke of luck finding you two here. What's up?' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted February 4, 2015 Share Posted February 4, 2015 "Aside from nit getting a minute to myself" , intoned Dex and itsme' in exact synchronized unison , "I am fully... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted February 5, 2015 Share Posted February 5, 2015 contented and ready for a beer,' said Itsme and.... 'hacked off with the whole policing system in this hell-hole,' said Dex, again both at once. Poppy tried to unravel the two conversations and ........... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted February 6, 2015 Share Posted February 6, 2015 In so doing, poppy fell asleep. She awoke to the sound of music, a carefree, lilting.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poppy Posted February 7, 2015 Share Posted February 7, 2015 melody that she knew but couldn't name. 'Itsme, Dex, do you know what that was? You're both music lovers, help me out here.' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
itsmeagain Posted February 7, 2015 Share Posted February 7, 2015 Dex immediately named that tune as Bohemian rhapsody, news poppy was pleased to take on board. "You know",declared poppy rffusively , " Ifeel rather breezy. Do you think its time to.." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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