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Posted

Granted, but the only partners available are complete war-pigs and kerb-slugs!

 

I wish I was a rich man, yidle-idle-iddle-idle etc.

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Posted

Granted, but you'd have to put up with me being camped in your garden begging for 24 hours a day!

 

I wish I was King of Cornwall.

Posted (edited)

Granted, Oh Mighty King Sedge!

 

Now you have the awesome and diminishing responsibility to forever more dress yourself as a traditional Cornish Pasty whilst quoting Jethro rejected jokes!

^This one's for Sedge!

 

Dimitra Granted!

 

Sadly, you have already met the love of you life, but as you refused to kiss the toad - the handsome prince will never be free!

 

I wish I could re decorate through thinking about it rather than doing it!

Edited by Chrissy
took too long
Posted

Granted! However, the house is decorated in the most horrific yellows and greens possible.

 

I wish my mountain of homework just disappeared.

Posted

Granted, but it turns out to be the University of Life, affiliated with the school of hard knocks.

 

I wish I had more charisma!

Posted

Granted! But the beach is so sun soaked it's soggy and a fluorescent yellow colour, sticking to everything it touches.

 

I wish I could occasionally grant others entry into my inner thoughts.

Posted
I wish I was more educated.

Because you got missed out - Granted. But you're only more educated in a very specialised area of expertise - the feeding habits of the red-spotted newt!

I wish I was on holiday.

Granted. But you forgot to pack any books and you're nowhere near anywhere you could get any from, so you spend the entire time lamenting the fact that you have wasted precious reading time.

 

I wish I didn't overheat so easily!

Posted

Granted. But now its -18 degrees out, there's six foot of snow and hypothermia is setting in.

 

I wish I could just sit and relax all day.

Posted

Granted but the dirty washing piles up around you and you cant find anywhere to sit and relax!

 

I wish I didnt have to pop to shop (its gonna rain)......

Posted

Granted but it rains so heavily your roof leaks and you get wet for nothing.

 

I wish my bus route home from town was open, so I didn't have to walk home :lol:

Posted

Granted, but the bus and everyone on it ends up on another planet where everything has been eaten by flying stingray type creatures . . . (and there's no Doctor to help you, because he's fictional and doesn't really exist!).

 

I wish nice things for the wonderful person who posts next! :lol:

Posted

Granted, but he'll be so rich now that he leaves the job where he would've met the love of his life, and now won't for another 5 years.

 

I wish I could be the winner in the Dumfries Half Marathon 2009.

Posted

Granted...but you will have x~ray vision :(

 

I wish I could win the lottery :lol:

Posted

Granted but its Monopoly money so its useless to you :lol:

 

I wish I didnt have blonde moments

Posted

Granted...you will no longer have blonde moments but you will have random moments :lol:

 

I wish I did not need to change the litter boxes :(

Posted

Granted but the lightbulbs have all blown and need changing instead and you have no ladder (Im in a devil of a mood today sorry :lol:)

 

I wish my daughter would turn her music down

Posted

Granted! Instead she is singing live with the newly formed band 'Make Yer Hurl' singing a medley of The Nolans and The Sex Pistols. :lol:

 

I wish I didn't have to walk the dog in the rain.

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