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Hey Gyre. What Bev said is absolutely right. you're doing everything you possibly can. You can take some comfort in that, and showing your strong side to her is good advice too. No one, not even God expects us to do what we are not capable of doing, so all you can do is your best, and I know you are already doing that. Sure you may fall apart in private, or later down the road, but deal with everything as it comes, don't cross bridges before they need to be crossed.
HUGS