Stuart MacBride

Thank you all for having me (in a non-dirty sense), and asking questions. And Kell - FLESH HOUSE will be out in May 2008, with a very different (to the Aberdeen books) novella out in July called SAWBONES. Which was a lot of fun to write. Nice and short, and more than a little twisted. You all have a good weekend, OK? Arrabest, Stuart

Glad you did, Kell, I was beginning to think nobody loved me. To be honest, after completing the latest book (FLESH HOUSE) it's hard to think of anything I enjoy about it at all. Well, I say completing, but there's still the line edit to go through yet. But once I've forgotten the nine months of torture and misery, I'll be back to the fun bit again: 'making shhhhhhh up'. Honestly, that's the best bit about writing, taking all the little voices in your head and forcing them into something you didn't know existed before. And I do enjoy meeting the people who buy the books. Signings can be a hit or miss thing - I once sat in the lobby of a draughty Costco in Glasgow for hours and hours, listening to the rain hammering on the roof, and only managed to shift about three books. Mind you, things like that do keep you from getting a big head, I suppose. Readings depend very much on the audience. If you get a good audience then it's a lot of fun, if you get a load of people who just sit there like poached fish it becomes a struggle to get any sort of atmosphere going. Luckily that doesn't happen too often. Reading groups are always fun. Especially as there's usually someone who turns up that hated something. Ah, the joys ;}#

Hey Inver, I've done a few festivals: Harrogate, Edinburgh, Kilmarnock, North Lanarkshire, Bristol,Inverness, Aberdeen... Oh, I'm such a hussy. If you like crime festivals then I can wholeheartedly recommend Harrogate - it's a very good way to meet and hang out with the very best in the genre. I can't big it up enough. And Winter Words sounds interesting - the best bet would be for your contacts to give HarperCollins a shout as they tend to organise all that kind of thing for me. I am but their humble, dancing monkey!

Er... I'm afraid Blythe Duff's got about 20 years on Watson (who should be round about 26-ish) And Donald Sinden for Insch...? Have you been drinking? And MARTIN SHAW as Miller? That's not drink talking, that's something way stronger. Time to seek professional help, Burghead Lass ;}#

Surprisingly enough, David Tennant was down to read the books for the audio (abridged) versions, but pulled out due to other, time-travelling commitments. Can't say that I blame him ;}# But then again, I think if he were to play Logan, most people would be wondering why Doctor Who was investigating prostitute murders in Aberdeen...

I'd have quite liked John Simm (played the part of Sam Tyler in Life On Mars) to play Logan, but now that he's been in LOM that would probably be a non-starter. In my mind Insch is a shaven-headed Robbie Coltrane - certainly it has to be someone who's very tall and very wide. Steel I have no idea for, but someone recently suggested that Helen Mirren would filthy up nicely for the part. From playing the Queen, to a wrinkly, chain-smoking, foul-mouthed, lesbian. What could be better? Did you have anyone in mind?

Loads of different stuff, Inver. Because I meet a lot of other crime writers at events and festivals I tend to pick up books by people I like, so my TBR pile is stuffed full of crime fiction. I like other stuff as well, but crime's my favourite. Recently enjoyed reads include: Ray Banks - SATURDAY'S CHILD Allan Guthrie - HARD MAN Adrian Hyland - DIAMOND DOVE Charlie Williams - DEADFOLK

Then you should give in to temptation Spooncat, there's no point denying yourself. They're full of fibre, low in fat, and sugar-free. Yes, and it depends. In that order. The first book I wrote isn't the first book that was published - it was a rather twisted comedy thriller thing and the writing was bloody terrible. I loved it at the time, but a lot of it makes me cringe now. But it was my first book, so I'm daftly proud of it. COLD GRANTE (the first one to be published) only went to HarperCollins, and they picked it up. So it didn't have to go anywhere else. Which is nice.

I can't say I enjoy it much at the moment, Michelle. But no - I wasn't one of these precocious sods who pen their first novel at the tender age of three. I absolutely hated English in school, though I loved to read. I only came in to writing in my mid-twenties, when a couple of friends talked me into giving it a shot. They were writing as a hobby, and I thought I'd give it a go. And got hooked. But up till then: nothing.

Well... I suppose... You'd probably have to take him out to dinner and dancing first though. He's not the kind to marry a strange lady on a first date.

Good guess, Pipistrelly, but no cigar. I used to work with a lovely lady whose last name was Insch. And I named him after her.

A couple are, Kell, but not until the third book - I was asked if I'd auction off a character for the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation and I thought I'd have a bit of fun with other people I know. So PC John Rickards is based on... John Rickards (writes very good crime novels for Penguin*) with only a few minor changes to make him work better in the story. Another friend, Alex Clark, became Zander Clark (I took liberties with him and made him a pornographer in the book). Everyone else probably have small slivers of other people I know / meet at events / sit within earshot of in the pub... But it's not a conscious thing. * The publisher, not the birds. That would just be silly

Hi SBW, Well, my books are set in Scotland and they're about the police, but other than that...? Possibly. I'd say Rebus is definitely a lone wolf kinda guy -- my books are more teamwork-based. Then again, they both have a darkness to them, and some of that good old-fashioned Scottish gallows humour. Ian Rankin's a terrific writer, so if my books come close to his kind of quality I'll be very proud indeed.

I don't think so, Inver. As it is I've got the whole North East of Scotland to play with and offshore too - it all falls under Grampian Police's jurisdiction. Mind you, with all this talk of 'policing without borders', international cooperation, and the 'war on terror', you never know.

Well, you're definitely in the right neighbourhood. I'm going to have to keep Logan's actual address a secret though, just in case someone's looking to break his legs...

Nope, you're not - I never use a real address for a scene in the books unless it's a public building (Force Headquarters, the Music Hall etc.) Given the kind of books I write I don't think it'd be fair to use someone's home as the setting for something horrible. So I make up streets that fit the general pattern of the area they're in and then feel free to have all manner of nasty things go on there.

Ever since I started going to crime conventions I've had a huge chunk of extra books to read - whenever I meet someone at these thing that I like, I do my best to go read their books. Which means I always have a vast backlog of crime fiction to read. This is good, because I genuinely love crime fiction. I don't think any other genre is so focussed on delivering a gripping plot, action and character-driven narrative. Writers I frequent are: Mark Billingham, Val McDermid, R.D. Wingfield (sadly nolonger with us), Simon Kernick, John Rickards... and many, many others.

Say's who? This is going to sound freaky weird, but I used my telephone. I rang Police Headquarters and spoke to some police officers, then I rang the Morgue and spoke to an Anatomical Pathology Technician. Everyone was incredibly helpful. For other stuff I just asked friends and friends of friends. You'd be surprised just how wide a spread of intelligence you already have at your fingertips. You just have to make use of it. And writing novels gives you the ultimate excuse for being a nosey 'person of dubious parentage'. What more do you need?

Ah, the good old weather question ;}# I was living in Kingswells when I started writing COLD GRANITE - it was the dead of winter and every time I looked out the window, ready to start the next scene it was either hammering down, drizzling, or snowing fit to burst. And that was what I put into the book. I don't think we've had a winter quite that crummy since, but that year it was sodding awful. As for DI Insch, his sweetie addiction just came about by accident while I was writing him. Now I use it as an excuse to put in all the sweets I remember loving from my childhood. I've recently discovered a wee sweetie shop in the nearest town that does old-fashioned Scottish confectionery, so look out for 'soor plooms', 'tatties' and 'granny sookers' making their appearance. And while we're talking about such things: I've given Tunnocks Tasty Caramel Wafers a plug in every single book and I've never received so much as a single freebie, never mind a lifetime's supply. COME ON TUNNOCKS - WHAT'S A GUY GOT TO DO?

So... do I make this shhhhhhh up as I go along, and am I schizophrenic? Hmm... Sort of, and sometimes. I use mind maps to get an overview of what the story's going to be about and some of the things that are going to happen. A novel takes up pretty much the whole whiteboard in my study (a short story takes a sheet of A4) and once I reach the edges of the board I sit down and start to write. I'll usually go back and replan 2 or 3 times during a book to keep up with all the little stuff that pops up while I'm writing that I didn't expect. Sometimes these are pretty major deviances from the original plot, but it's all grist to the whatnot. As to the talking characters: some days it's easier than others, but as I'm not a complete crazy person I don't actually talk to them. I know what they're likely to say in any given situation and I write it down, simple as that. I'm not a big believer in all this 'channelling characters as if they're real people' stuff. They're not real people, I made them up. I am their GOD and they will worship me or suffer the consequences! AAAAAAAAAAAARGH!!!

Hi Sooz, Glad you liked them! And yes, I do indeed have another one in the pipeline, no so much on the horizon as bearing down on me like a Sumo wrestler in spandex pants. I'm editing the fourth Logan McRae book at the moment and I've got about... 4, maybe 5 days more to do, then there'll be a huge chunk of typing up to do. FLESH HOUSE (as it's going to be called) will be out in the UK in May 2008. And after that I've got a contract for another two Logan books with HarperCollins, so I'm still going to be doing this in 2010. After that, I'm thinking about becoming a plumber.

I think the people who really inspire me are writers like R.D.Wingfield (sadly no longer with us, but he wrote the books A TOUCH OF FROST were based on), Val McDermid, Mark Billingham, and Larry Niven believe it or not. I think I take something from every book I read, whether it's 'Jesus, I'm going to have to try harder to come even close to this...' to 'Holy shhhhhhh that was bloody awful. NEVER, EVER do something that bad!' The only person who scares me - writer or otherwise - is me. I know what actually goes on inside my head...

A lovely man eh? I fear you've been drinking, PP, but thank you. I'll be here all month (try the shrimp), popping in and out between bouts of horrible editing and the odd event. Like the Inverness Book Festival on Wednesday and the post-Inverness Book Festival Hangover on Thursday. Ah the joys...