Roland Butter

There's a Guy Works Down the Chip Shop Swears He's Elvis - Kirsty MacColl (Yessss!!!!!!!)

Peckham Finishing School for Girls. It looks like it's going to be a cracker.(Not really ....)

There's The Sportswriter by Richard Ford. It's not really directly about sport, but its protagonist is - yes, you've guessed it - a sportswriter. It is a good book, though, and well worth a read. Other than teenagers' fiction, though, I can't say I've come across anything that would fit the bill.

Little Jazz Bird - Blossom Dearie

Yep, agree with that. When you're talking about Brazilians, you've got to give them the benefit of the doubt. Ah, some common sense - shame you're not writing for the newspapers. My paper today had detailed analyses of where Capello's getting it wrong by three different journalists, none of whom have ever kicked a ball at even semi-pro level, as far as I know. Complete and utter nonsense. I'm confidently predicting us to sail through the group and the knockout stages, to meet North Korea in the final ...

The Murders in the Rue Morgue by Edgar Allan Poe is one which has stood the test of time. As classics go, it's one of the classic-est ...

Little By Little - Dusty Springfield (Many classic duets with Tammi - Ain't No Mountain High Enough, You're All I Need To Get By, Ain't Nothing Like The Real Thing, For Your Precious Love, California Soul - check 'em out ... classic soul)

No-one wants to lose their first game, Diane. You can even get through the entire group stage without winning, as long as you don't lose. It should pick up a bit in the knockout stages. Plus, these days there are so many teams stuffed with journeyman pros from the European leagues that they cancel each other out. They can stop you playing, even if they're not world-class players themselves. In the old days, you'd never have a problem with beating teams like ...oooh, let's see ... Peru, Iran or Costa Rica, say.

That's not surprising, Kylie - you're the readingest person I know

I've read two of those ... and seen one film. Maybe I should try harder, but I must confess I tend to rebel against reading what other people tell me I ought to. I've bought so many "worthy" books in the past that I've ended up putting aside because they're not my cup of tea, they're someone else's idea of a good book.

Wasn't that Kim Weston, rather than Tammi? Still a great choice, though! Two Lovers - Mary Wells

Brazil v North Korea tonight - at last, my "second" team in action. Come on the Commies! Pak Doo-ik is watching you! Remember '66 .

Does She Have A Friend For Me - Gene Chandler

Got to question the mentality of anyone who'd pay good money to get into a football match and then spend the whole time blowing a plastic trumpet. Or, indeed, anyone who'd pay good money to get into a Test match and spend eight hours chanting "Barmy Army, Barmy Army"... Doesn't happen in croquet, I can tell you that.

I'm with peacefield and the "rational explanation" lobby. Teenage boys have very active imaginations late at night.

A friend of mine from Canada brought me over a copy of The Book of Negroes a while back, Talisman - Lawrence Hill lives in Toronto and came into the bookshop where she works. It's a very good read - I'm not normally a fan of the sprawling historic novel, but this, I thought, was very good. I hope you'll enjoy it.

Time to start Carlos Ruiz Zafon's Shadow of the Wind, I think. A mate has been nagging me to read it for the last year, and I think I'm finally in the mood. And it'll shut him up, too ....

I wasn't damning you for having an opinion. But if you express an opinion, it's only fair that you should expect it to be challenged - that's what makes a discussion forum interesting!

Finished Jim White's You'll Win Nothing With Kids, and I enjoyed it far more than I'd expected. There were a few stereotypes in there - the eye-bulging, fist-pumping team manager, the over-pushy parent - but there were also some worthwhile reflections on father/son relationships, on growing up and on the purpose of sport. And it was well written, too, as you'd expect from someone who makes a living from sports journalism. Not the most taxing read, but I'd recommend it from anyone wanting to get away from the ... er ... football

I hope you're being ironic, rather than arrogant. Picking the players who score the most goals is a great strategy for Fantasy Football. Beyond, perhaps, under-10s, it's not so useful in real football. You don't get to have a 15 year career as a Premier League professional if you're useless. It's as simple as that.

Sardonic *%$

Heskey's won 60 international caps under four different coaches. Michael Owen once said he's the best strike partner he's ever played with. You may be right, but that would mean four international coaches and one of England's best ever strikers are all wrong.

The Shadow Of Your Smile - Tony Bennett

I Am The Black Gold Of The Sun - Rotary Connection

Radio Africa - Latin Quarter