Jump to content
  • Announcements

    • Hayley

      Signing Up   11/06/2018

      Signing Up is once again available. New members are very welcome
    • Hayley

      March Supporter Giveaway   03/02/2019

      So March has crept up on us and I'm thrilled to finally show you the GREAT (he he...) March giveaway!     This time we have a gorgeous print of The Great Gatsby's most famous line from thestorygift.co.uk AND a Great Gatsby tea from the Literary Tea Company! This particular tea is Peach Blossom (which sounds delicious and I kind of wish I could keep it myself...) and the tin features another Gatsby quote.  If you'd like to see the other literary teas available (there are lots, I spent ages looking) you can find them both at the Literary Tea Company's etsy store (https://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/LiteraryTeaCompany) or at their own website, theliteraryteacompany.co.uk .   As always, supporters are automatically entered into the giveaway and if you're not a supporter but want to be included in this months giveaway you can become a supporter on patreon here... https://www.patreon.com/bookclubforum .   A winner will be chosen at random on the last day of the month. Good luck!  
Sign in to follow this  
itsmeagain

Continue the story Game 2.

Recommended Posts

Gabriel C More, 48, faced a dilemma. Does he tell his wife that he is going out with the lads or does he stay in and watch reruns of Netflix films from the past year?

His wife , Hilary, came in and presented Gabriel with....

Edited by itsmeagain

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

a hot cup of horlicks and one digestive biscuit, the kind with no chocolate. Hilary was on a diet ...again... but Gabriel, who was as thin as a pen pusher's bicep, felt it was pushing spousal loyalty a bit far to expect him to stick to it as well. 'The Perfect Man' came up the title of Hilary's chic flick of choice. Gab groaned, 'Luv, I might just hop down to the local for a quick one with the boys, play a few games of pool, you know,  leave you to enjoy your film in peace.' He gave her a quick peck on the cheek then made a swift exit, before she could object.

Hilary gave a sigh of relief, she thought he'd never go. Once she heard the back door click, she quickly switched channels to her favourite murder series. She might just pick up a few ideas. Tonight's episode, entitled ...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

"The husband's nightmare day", was about Horatio D Wernberg, an American art dealer whose wife developed a psychotic aversion to the word 'toast.'

When delightful hubby brought up a plate of toast to her boudoir, she killed him, apparently by pushing him down the stairs.

Hilary was disgusted. Annoying as Gabriel was, he simply was not aggressive and he had a soft side. He loved to go playing football.

She hated his so called 'mates' who she had barred from the house.

It was now 11 pm and Hilary was asleep , having fallen asleep whilst watching "Naked Flame:Stories to chill your spine."

Gabriel staggered in and went to bed.

At 7am a knock at the front door startled Hilary, sprawled, still, on the settee.

"Hello it's.....

Edited by itsmeagain

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Algie here.' Algernon Dreadnought, Gab's bosom buddy. Hilary couldn't stand him. He gave a snigger.

'Hello, what have we here? In the dogbox are we? Gabby kicked you out onto the couch again, has he?'

The crime channel was still playing from the night before and there was some lurid and particularly gruesome murder scene flashing across the screen. Hilary quickly turned it off but not before pleasantly picturing Algernon lying there in the midst. Dead.

'Not planning on knocking the old boy off are we?' and he gave a great guffaw.

'What do you want Algernon? And would you kindly remove your grubby arm off my vintage antimacassar!'

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

"Algie..Algie my old mate..you'd better go and I will catch up with you later. Why are you here?", asked a bleary eyed , sleepy, Gabriel, looking dozily downstairs, his hair untamed.

"Delicate matter. June's chucked me out again ...can I stay here after work tonight?"

"No pal....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

he gestured quickly at Hilary with his eyes, 'but I'll tell you what, Reggie's home alone at the mo. Missus has gone to stay with her sister or something, give him a crack.'

'Appreciate it, mate! Can I give you a lift to work?' And a short time later they were crawling along in the usual morning rush hour traffic.

'Do you ever wonder what it's all about, Gabby? Same old 9 to 5 job, year in, year out. The missus constantly yammering on in your ear, organising every spare moment God gave you. Don't you ever yearn for a bit of excitement, a bit of adventure, stepping out of your comfort zone, like?'

'Hadn't really thought about it, Algie. What do you suggest?'

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

"You could come fishing with me. I play golf every third Tuesday and I go to the pub most nights. "

Unimpressed, Gabriel snorted derisively but pretended it was his sinus problem.

"My sinus problem", he said.

Algie continued.

"We could go and watch some films."

"Men watching films sat together? They will think we are gay."

"Who are 'they', pal?" asked Algernon, affronted.

Edited by itsmeagain

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

'You know, all those elderly, blue-haired ladies making use of cheap weekday prices. No, what I'd really like to do is run away to some warm Mediterranean spot. You know, Benidorm or Ibeza or Marjorca. Somewhere like that.'

'Well, why don't we? Let's tell work we're taking our annual holidays and just go today.'
'But we'll need our passports, mine's at home, Hilary would never let me have it if she knew what I was up to. Wait!! Today's her Women's Division meeting, it goes on for hours. Quick turn around and I'll go home and pack!'

So just like that ...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

the two blokes went to Ibiza together. Refuge for drunks from Britain and for anybody wanting to drown their sorrows in a pool of booze. Tranx that is, tranqullisers to the literate amongst us, are allegedly available illegally. Gabriel and Algie soon got hold of some tranqullisers and so

at 9pm when the mobile he had in his sweaty back pocket, rang, Gabriel was slurred of speech and more dopy than normal in presentation.

"My God have I really missed you? Oh cover me in jam and smother me in sloppy kisses."

"Mr More...it's Sergeant Dick Grasshopper from Morecambe constabulary. Do not make comments to me regarding kissing or other garbage like that. Your wife put in a missing bloke alert..not wanted back ..subsection 4 of the Useless oafs missing Act 1989. She does not want you back but needs to know where you are so....

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

she can start divorce proceedings.' Gab peered at the phone, 'Hey, Algie, this is your phone! We must have got them mixed up. Someone called Constable Leafhopper or something, wants you.'

Algie was pretty quick to realise it was his slippery neighbour Gamble Abbot, posing as a copper. He'd had his eye on June for months. Well he was welcome to her, but he wasn't going to make it easy for him. He hung up.

Gab's phone rang. 'Annabelle's Detective Agency here, I've had instructions to locate the whereabouts of a certain Gabriel C. More. I believe this is his number?' Gab hung up. Without a word, the two men dropped their phones into the nearest rubbish bin.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

decamp. Ibiza wasn't really their scene anyway with all the lager louts and chavs. They signed on as crew for a sailing boat, headed for ...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

it I wasn't informed of this before we left? I would have taken a direct train if I'd have known.' Mark, if one was brutally honest, was a few fries short of a happy meal.

Algie raised a disbelieving eyebrow,'You mean direct from Ibeza?'

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

"Yes. In the modern world they say anything may be proven!! If I claimed the world is flat and I can jump off Tibet and land on Mars you will prove me wrong. So prove to me..where are we docking?"

Edited by itsmeagain

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

'How would I know? I'm just the deckhand. You better go and ask the captain.' Odd bloke, thought Albie, in fact, apart from him and old Gabby,the whole crew seemed decidedly strange. Take for instance, Sea Captain Long Johns,

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

54, alleged son of a Greek farmer and a Walthamstow dishwasher named Maud. Last time he had a wash the bathtub became irreparably stained, such was the muck on his torso.

"Howdy partners and a very ho ho ho shiver me timbers", he hailed everyone with, swigging rum through a straw while keeping....

Edited by itsmeagain

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

one eye on them all, whilst his wall eye gazed off somewhere into the wild blue yonder. 'The Swiss border by nightfall. What say you all?'

'Uh hum,' Porter Nomack cleared his throat, 'how will you accomplish that exactly?'

'Don't you worry your pretty little heads, me lovelies, Cap'n Long John's got it all in 'and,' and he gave the parrot perched on his shoulder a hearty back thump causing it to ...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

However, it did not have quite the same effect on Polly, who lost a number of feathers every time the captain showed such unrestrained exuberance. He bit the Captain sharply on his left ear then left no doubt what he intended doing with the scalding tea once the kettle boiled. 'Put a cork in it, you confounded varmint!' but of course ...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

our redoubtable Captain Long Johns kept going, a stream of verbal diarrhoea following The good Ship Lollipop on its less than merry way across the sea.

"Do you have a book on the coast of Europe?"

This timid question interrupted the sedate repose of Wilfred "Beef" Burger, 45, a passenger on the good Ship Lollipop.

 

"My name's Mark Nomark and I feel the Cap'n is a clown...telling folks we are sailing to Switzerland. My God you know Switzerland has no coast."

Edited by itsmeagain

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

'Calm your waters, man, I'm sure the good Captain knows what he's doing. He's probably going to put into port at Montpellier or Marseille and send us on our way by bus or train. Now sit back and relax and I'd appreciate it if you'd let me do the same,' and so saying Beefy put a newspaper back over his brick red face and went to sleep.

'I'm sure that was the Rock of Gibraltar we just passed,' muttered Mark worriedly.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

was being applied to her rather florid features and her old-fashioned corset was getting an extra heave in the hope of containing some of her ample curves.  She was making an extra effort, today she was dining at the Captain's table, always the highlight of her trips. She'd sent a note asking to be seated next to him as a special treat. She hadn't met the captain yet, but she was sure...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

he was lithe and sexy, which after all, was all she required in a man.

A bell rang and Mason Fortnum , 45, trod the decks yelling "lunch is up , sit at the Cap'n's table and enjoy your food ."

Priscilla was 48 yet felt herself to be 23.

"I look very good" she said to herself as she strolled along.....

Edited by itsmeagain

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  



×